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Comments (271)
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577
Getfuckedcommietrash 577 points ago +577 / -0

Lmao amazing work pede!

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deleted 416 points ago +416 / -0
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tokenninja 222 points ago +223 / -1

Daddy, what did you do in the war to defeat socialism in America. 😂 seriously passing this to everyone i know.

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MainstreamDeviant 80 points ago +80 / -0

dusts off shitposts

"Son, its time you learned the art of the meme"

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deleted 41 points ago +42 / -1
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Nunyo_Biznez 30 points ago +30 / -0

Yes, we will take your Ak's and AR's and BAN fracking, all while rounding up those super predators! Unless that super predator happens to be my crack smoking son...

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FluhanWu 17 points ago +17 / -0

For max effect say the bad news but refer to it as good news.

Then only the swingers will catch on. The fully hypnotized libzombies will nod along and agree with you because they aren't really paying attention. They never were.

Before hanging up ask them to grab a pen and write something down then give a short simple URL like https://joebiden.info/ or something similar. Tell them the best fact checks are all on that page.

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Boof_Bro 7 points ago +7 / -0

Whats the URL that brings you to the .win page with all the Hunter leaks?

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deleted 5 points ago +5 / -0
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deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
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memechallenger33 7 points ago +7 / -0

Hello, Undecided voter. This is the Biden Campaign calling. We are here to encourage you to come out to vote for Joe! He wants to repeal the Hyde Amendment so there can be government funded abortions. All women need access to more abortions. He is ready to repeal the Trump tax cuts from two years ago that increased your take-home pay. And, Joe plans to ban fracking on Day 1! He also wants all his supporters to know that those stories in the New York Post about his business dealings with China are just a distraction, which is why the New York Post was censored by Twitter. He also wants you to know that he does not remember ever meeting the man making accusations against him on Tucker Carlsons show, but he also can’t remember what he had for breakfast either. Have a good day!

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Oback_Barama 128 points ago +128 / -0

Hi! This XXXX, from Joe Biden for President. Election Day, Nov 3rd is coming quickly. Can we count on your vote, or even better early vote, despite the fact that Hunter's laptop has been verified as containing concrete evidence that Joe is compromised by Communist China?

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meteorknife 77 points ago +77 / -0

We are the news now.

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deleted 10 points ago +11 / -1 (edited)
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UncleUncle 7 points ago +7 / -0

Hi! This is <XXX> with the Joe Biden campaign. We're calling to remind you that a vote for Donald Trump is a vote for stable Democracy! Instead, Vote for Joe Biden and help us end American Constitutionalism and destroy the country.

Can we count on you?

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Cesare_Borgia 46 points ago +46 / -0

Ok that's genius. Thanks for the idea.

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Whoopies_tds 43 points ago +43 / -0

I have been getting 10 calls/day this week. I string them along to waste their time and tomorrow or Friday will start asking about CEFC and the Biden crime family

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Npc-1776 21 points ago +21 / -0

I was wondering when I should drop the Ukraine China connection -- Friday sounds like a good day. We're currently at convincing me that we're not going to export fossil fuel jobs overseas as unicorn farts will generate all the power we need once we get unicorns and train them to fart on demand.

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Block_Helen 10 points ago +10 / -0

Don't even bother. You'll never convince them of anything and they'll stop calling you. Continuing to waste their time is preferable. That way you might actually keep them from rounding up other Biden votes.

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Prometheus76 20 points ago +20 / -0

Ask them to repeat the answers because you didn't really understand. And ask stupid, detailed questions. And when they ask you a question, repeat yourself a lot and say unrelated things and tell unrelated stories. Both in phone calls and in meetings.

In phone calls, I would really push how progressive and exciting it is that Biden wants to bring communism to America with his close ties to China. Shit like that. I'm sure you're killing it.

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Whoopies_tds 11 points ago +11 / -0

I'm sure you're killing it.

So far I’ve just been burning their clock but now my goal is to start flipping them against Biden as step 1 and killing it will be if I can get them to say they’ll vote for Trump.

  • Step 1 is easy, “I was really excited to vote for Joe and his policies and wish he ran in 2016 but with all the emails from his son, his business partner that Tony Bobabooy guy and that other partner in jail....not the Devon guy, the other one, I just can’t support Joe. Also that super predator thing and crime bill really bother me....plus he seemed to lie a lot in the debate. I don’t know what do you think?....”
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Prometheus76 10 points ago +10 / -0

The hardest part of this election is that I don't think anyone is voting for Biden. I think they're just voting against Trump. I've had some luck with "If trump was compromised, don't you think we'd know by now after all the investigations?" And I've also been taking a conciliatory approach like this: "Look, I get that Trump can be an ass and obnoxious, but I pay less in taxes than four years ago, not to mention (whatever Trump's policy change you favor)".

Going anti-Biden doesn't seem to work as well, mainly because no one is really making a case for Biden anyway. Everyone who is voting Biden is just "anti-Trump".

Good luck!

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 5 points ago +5 / -0

Excellent strategy. Have you seen the guy here with the username 'rambles off topic' or something like that? His skillset would be ideal, he's really good at it. Funny af too.

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deleted 19 points ago +19 / -0
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Block_Helen 10 points ago +10 / -0

Yep, wasting their time and resources is absolutely the best.

Don't let on that you'll never vote for Biden. Just keep saying you're not sure, you're undecided.

I do this with people who come to the door. Or did, now the lefties are all askeered.

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 2 points ago +2 / -0

You're describing my approach to Jehovah's witnesses. Lol

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Pedeville 1 point ago +1 / -0

they get paid every second they manage to speak with you before being chased off

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 1 point ago +1 / -0

Paid by the second. Billable hours? Lol

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ImWithHearse 2 points ago +2 / -0

This is best. Waste their time.

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aslaniscoming 13 points ago +14 / -1

WOW

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deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
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Bearing51 194 points ago +194 / -0

Wow, this is gold!

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deleted 43 points ago +43 / -0
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Oback_Barama 33 points ago +34 / -1

You know, signing up to text for Joe might be fun. Follow the script and when someone says that yes they are voting for Joe reply with:

Great! Between now and when you vote, if you hear anyone talking about or see stories about Tony Bobulinski just ignore them, you don't need to know about that!

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IlhanOmarsFagBrother 5 points ago +5 / -0

This I Love - Axl Rose

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Long_time_lurker 177 points ago +177 / -0

You could also make calls, but just make them for Trump instead :)

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ClownTamer 126 points ago +126 / -0

That’d be hilarious. You get their call list and immediately begin going down the line telling people to Keep America Great.

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bigmikespen15 189 points ago +190 / -1

Or sell them on the reverse, but badly:

We need to raise taxes on everyone! Are you ready to pay your share?

Before we begin, I should inform you my pronouns are zim/zam

We will have President Xi in the white house to help Biden guide us through this next great leap!

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TheBroodwich 112 points ago +112 / -0

I swear Dems are thiiiiiiiiiis close to unironically saying it is time for a "great leap forward".

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Uzaka123 47 points ago +47 / -0

close? I Thought that's what they were doing.

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UpTrump 45 points ago +45 / -0

They are calling it the "great reset"

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WarpedSage 37 points ago +37 / -0

Aren't you ready for "The Great Reset Forward"?

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AlphaNathan 13 points ago +13 / -0

THAT'S COMMIE SPEAK

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deleted 11 points ago +11 / -0
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Friendly_B 6 points ago +6 / -0

Replacing the Green New Deal

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deleted 5 points ago +5 / -0
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deleted 7 points ago +7 / -0
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Formerlurker92 5 points ago +5 / -0

Green new deal might as well be

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PeytonManThing 1 point ago +1 / -0

It’s called a great leap FORWARD, it’s like progressivism, it’s obviously great just look at the name. Duh!

Democrats really make arguments this stupid all the time

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Arriveria 30 points ago +30 / -0

thats actually good idea tell them Biden wants to raise taxes for pronoun awareness

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TrumpBringsLight 7 points ago +7 / -0

brilliant!

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deleted 6 points ago +6 / -0
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deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
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lifeisahologram 22 points ago +22 / -0

Lol I’d love that

I’d say something like “Do you believe the rich are not paying their fair share? Should they pay more in taxes? Also which group do you think best represents wealthy to you? Those who make over 50K a year, those who make over 30k a year, or simply those who are employed?”

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residue69 5 points ago +5 / -0

Those who don't depend on gov't assistance.

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Philhelm 3 points ago +3 / -0

Exactly. It seems that it's all out war to break the back of the middle class.

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 2 points ago +2 / -0

sheeeeit, dis udda brudda gotst him tree pair o Jordans frum the store we just hit. I only got one. THAT'S wealthy! When do I gets minez?

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NomadicKrow 10 points ago +10 / -0

You can't flimflam the Zimzam

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Mister-T 4 points ago +4 / -0

Or ask if they have any kids so that Joe could come by and sniff em.

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ILearnedToCode 4 points ago +4 / -0

Before you vote for Biden, he just wants to know if your kids smell good? He only wants people to vote for him that have good smelling kids.

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Mitschu 5 points ago +5 / -0

Hello Jamal! This is the Biden campaign asking for your pledge of support. This election year, we expect the negroid and felon blocs to be very important to winning the popular vote, so please reply IAMBLACK if you intend to vote for Joe, or IAMNOTBLACK if you intend to vote for the racist.

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WiseDonkey 60 points ago +60 / -0

More subtle: "I'm with the Biden campaign, and I just want to make sure you aren't being swayed by the claims about Joe selling influence to China, Ukraine, and Russia, or the claims of him turning a blind eye to his son's drug use while passing a crime bill to lock up thousands of black men for similar crimes. Can we count on your vote?"

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MAGAconvert 30 points ago +30 / -0

Then when they say that haven't heard of that, "Please, don't Google it. Yes, there's a lot of stuff out there that looks like "evidence", such as a voice recording of Hunter saying he's partnering with the spy chief of China, or his texts saying he has to give Joe half the money he gets from a foreign entity. But we're pretty sure this was all put there by Russia."

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de9ebkmd7 18 points ago +18 / -0

"Feel free to Google it, anything you find will have been fact checked by our big tech partners at Google and Youtube so you know you can rely on it."

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deleted 15 points ago +15 / -0
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FluhanWu 7 points ago +7 / -0

Yes familiar. It's a type of hypnosis they are in I think.

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 2 points ago +2 / -0

Yuri Brezmenov called it demoralization. He found by personal experience that these people are irredeemable, can't be persuaded by ANY amount of evidence. This is exactly what I have experienced with every single leftist I have spoken with all year.

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deleted 9 points ago +9 / -0
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Prometheus76 8 points ago +8 / -0

Tell them it's illegal to look at the transcripts or the phone calls because it violates privacy.

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ILearnedToCode 9 points ago +10 / -1

But then they wont look, because they are retarded and would actually believe it's illegal and fear doing it

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 1 point ago +1 / -0

They don't DESERVE to know!!

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deleted 15 points ago +15 / -0
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Friendly_B 12 points ago +12 / -0

Sure, that'll grab 'em.

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deleted 6 points ago +6 / -0
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deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
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LaLaChickadee 3 points ago +3 / -0

This one is the best out of all of them I've read so far.

1
Long_time_lurker 1 point ago +1 / -0

Oh yeah, I'm sure they have checks. Would have to see how they're set up to figure out what they are, but people can always share observations on how it works and see if there are obvious tells of some type.

1
CuomoisaMassMurderer 1 point ago +1 / -0

BRILLIANT!!

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IcculusBased9 144 points ago +144 / -0

Diabolical pede is diabolical.

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TrumpTrainJune152015 34 points ago +34 / -0

The absolute maddest of lads.

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Camperdon 114 points ago +115 / -1

I'm a simple pede. If something makes me laugh-snort, then I updoot and share.

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MaximumMAGA 2 points ago +2 / -0

I'm just looking forward to all of the gen2 "Draft of Daughters" memes that will be born out of this thread

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spez_inthe_turdpond 70 points ago +70 / -0

😆

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deleted 65 points ago +66 / -1
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AccipiterQ 26 points ago +26 / -0

"I hate to say it was bad, but the trainer and a few participants seemed nervous, they kept asking if the rest of us had seen the interview on Tucker last night. They also said there's pictures...really bad pictures...of Hunter. I don't think they support Joe, they seemed more concerned about his business transactions in China"

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deleted 29 points ago +30 / -1
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Mitschu 7 points ago +7 / -0

I want to be part of a brighter future, but could I please have a different trainer assigned to me? The one I was working with today kept saying that most of our side want to defund the police, so I shouldn't be surprised if people I reach out to have questions about whether Kamala Harris will be more loyal to Black Americans or her fellow blue pigs. When I told him that Harris had a really good inner-city track record, he kept shutting me down and interrupting to condescend to me and point out that if it weren't Trump in office, he'd vote against Biden just on principle for daring to have her on the ticket. That's just not acceptable from ANYONE in 2020, much less someone working FOR the Biden campaign who is SUPPOSED to be against hatred and division. think we should be 110% ready to stand behind a Biden OR Harris administration depending on which way the winds blow after the election, and I can't work together with someone so racist and bigoted. As a woman and as a Person of Color, to have someone who doesn't understand their own privilege ON the Biden team treat me so poorly and keep acting like I'm an uninformed child like he did is just unacceptable.

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deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
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nero2003 48 points ago +49 / -1

Perfecto. PSYOPS!

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RooftopKoreanBBQ 38 points ago +38 / -0

Doing God's work. Amazing, pede!

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WTCUS 32 points ago +32 / -0

based as fuck

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deleted 28 points ago +29 / -1
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RussianAgent13 39 points ago +39 / -0

That shouldn't be hard.

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deleted 24 points ago +24 / -0
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Taqiyya_Mockingbird [S] 1 point ago +1 / -0

you aren't even trying to make it believable

Exactly the point.

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IcculusBased9 26 points ago +26 / -0

u/WallBot ludicrous bricks!

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 1 point ago +1 / -0

Ludicrous bricks were always my favorite bricks. Our sole bot doesn't do ludicrous, but will usually respond to just bricks, or quad bricks, or a few others I forget at the moment. You summoned it correctly, yet nothing. I am sad Pepe. Am dissappoint :(

u/WallBot get this patriot a brick

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DonaldJLincoln 21 points ago +21 / -0

Top kek.

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 2 points ago +2 / -0

We have the best autists, no problem there. Are you hip to Topcat?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NToYkBYezZA

Amazing music, from a time gone by

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magastrophysicist 1 point ago +1 / -0

Haha I remember that cartoon! They were probably replays by the time I saw them since I'm in my 30s.

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Indianapede 20 points ago +20 / -0

“We will make sure the organizers see it”?

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colonial113 16 points ago +16 / -0

Standard bot response

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NYCforTrump 6 points ago +6 / -0

Biden's outsourced his campaign to Chinese bots. Low energy!

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Smellsfishy 13 points ago +13 / -0

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

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DrVSGGEOTUSPhD 12 points ago +12 / -0

OMG, this is fucking HILARIOUS, I'm dying over here like someone with information which could lead to the conviction of Hillary Clinton.

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deleted 4 points ago +4 / -0
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Pedeville 1 point ago +1 / -0

so he can die like someone in seal team tha Biden knows the location of?

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deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
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Hail_Milo 12 points ago +12 / -0

I wish I thought of this. I spam all of them texts/calls or give false info but this is MUCH more damaging internally.

10/10.

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AsaNisiMAGA 10 points ago +10 / -0

I like the cut of your jib. 👍

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deleted 9 points ago +9 / -0
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WerewolfDad 9 points ago +9 / -0

Democracy shouldn't be whoever can lasso the most idiots. Does anyone actually vote based on texts or calls? If anything, whichever presidential candidate sends the least texts probably gets more votes in a 2 party system.

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deleted 6 points ago +6 / -0
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deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
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CuomoisaMassMurderer 1 point ago +1 / -0

Idiocracy. What are electrolytes, anyway?

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Pedeville 1 point ago +1 / -0

its imbued in my hippopotamus

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GEOTUSMAGA 8 points ago +8 / -0

Based troll

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Julia_J 7 points ago +7 / -0

Haha!

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deleted 7 points ago +8 / -1
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deleted 7 points ago +7 / -0
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deleted 6 points ago +6 / -0
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7.62swinebuster 6 points ago +6 / -0

You mean they have no vetting process in place for field operatives?!? This whole time I thought these people had their sht squared away. HAHAHAHA

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Taqiyya_Mockingbird [S] 6 points ago +6 / -0

I never even got that far, as I said, I never do anything other than sign up and then wait for them to ask how it went. Then I make up a story about a trainer that may not even exist. That way, they lose focus on beating Trump and get paranoid about who the traitor among them might be.

This is exactly what the Stasi used to do in East Germany. Neighbor against neighbor. If they realize they don't like it, maybe they'll realize Socialism isn't really what they want.

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 2 points ago +2 / -0

This is the way

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undercovermaga 2 points ago +2 / -0

Op could be sneaky

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jsphere256 6 points ago +6 / -0

Are you talking to a robot?? Holy shitsnacks

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Light_HIV_Effect 3 points ago +3 / -0

that's a text bot

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Boof_Bro 5 points ago +5 / -0

I just spent over an hour in the Zoom training class. Pretty lame. Here's the link to their Slack group to get started and get access to their "DeM DiAlEr: https://2020victory.io/generalslack

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 1 point ago +1 / -0

A real slacker

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deleted 5 points ago +5 / -0
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Taqiyya_Mockingbird [S] 5 points ago +5 / -0

Thanks for the LOVE, everybody! Right back at each and every one of you. Mods, thanks for the sticky, you are all gods.

Let's keep fighting, don't get complacent, and VOTE TRUMP 2020! Don't forget to keep the SENATE and take back the HOUSE!

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 1 point ago +1 / -0

Supermajority or bust!

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deleted 5 points ago +5 / -0
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deleted 5 points ago +5 / -0
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Cram 4 points ago +4 / -0

I'm glad we're on the same side.

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King_Boobus_Toobus 4 points ago +4 / -0

Good work Agent Mockingbird!

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deleted 4 points ago +4 / -0
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deleted 4 points ago +4 / -0
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TrumpTrainJune152015 3 points ago +3 / -0

This is brilliant.

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PremiumPatriotPepe 3 points ago +3 / -0

Doing God's work.

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OrenthalJamesObama 3 points ago +3 / -0

WITCH HUNT

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The_Spicy_Memes_Chef 3 points ago +3 / -0

BASED DOUBLE-AGENT

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YDS2016 3 points ago +3 / -0

Niiiiiiiiiiicccccccceeee

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SJBHamilton 2 points ago +2 / -0 (edited)

This takes trolling to a whole new level.

Expertly done!

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GorillaTime 2 points ago +2 / -0

4D Chess Master move.

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Thehumancentipede 2 points ago +2 / -0

THIS IS FANTASTIC WORK!!!!!!

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November3rd 2 points ago +2 / -0

Doing the Lord's work good job Pede!

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deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
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FlamingButBased 2 points ago +2 / -0

Omg I love it.

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GEOTUS-Trump 2 points ago +2 / -0

Perfect Pede! The East German Stasi would be pleased with your work comrade.

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PropagandaWizard1984 2 points ago +2 / -0

A little too "on the nose" if you ask me. But it's your operation to run pede. My advice, next time reel them in a little slower, don't jump right to the crack fueled foot jobs.

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HotNismo 2 points ago +2 / -0

THE POWER OF KEK COMPELLS YOU!

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CuomoisaMassMurderer 2 points ago +2 / -0

Have you ever seen the YT of Benny Hinn with light sabers? Irreverant af but hilarious