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79
chopz 79 points ago +79 / -0

Dear sender,

Come get your asses shot to death in my front yard. Fuck right off!

-Me

38
HeavyHebrew 38 points ago +38 / -0

Right? Hey, Sarah, come on down to my house with your antifa buddies. It will be fun and games until the house starts blaring Pumped Up Kicks

13
Side-o-Beef_Curtains 13 points ago +13 / -0

I got your theme song right here...

https://youtu.be/EJC-_j3SnXk

11
JohnMcCainsTumors 11 points ago +11 / -0

Oh man this would be a great movie scene

3
Taffy550 3 points ago +3 / -0

Hey, my favorite song, also my ring tone. If I got a postcard like that, and the person showed up, I'd invited them and then lock the deadbolt. Hahahaha

8
Scooby721 8 points ago +8 / -0

This. This right here should be your answer. Also, don't forget to throw in a "go fuck yourself" as well.