Your children are being indoctrinated if this anti American bullshit is what your wife spouts.

You have to take it apart piece by piece. If you try to dismantle all of it at the same time, too much gets lost.

I would recommend BLM first and how the money they take goes to ActBlue, and from there, the DNC, and show her the inner cities that have been led by Democrats to their demise for as long as they've been in control. Also bring up David Dorn (RIP) and the other black Americans killed by a) the rioters, b) inner city violence, and c) compare those numbers to the actual cop/white-on-black murder rate - and explain the difference between justified shootings and not.

Next is the LGBTSIJGFDH:LFGKHG:LH shit. Show her a typical San Fransisco pride parade, drag queen story hour, and Alz Heimer's comment about eight year olds transitioning. Bring morality and childhood innocence into the argument, and explain how wrong it is that parents get little say in the matter of what society decides to feed them when they're not allowed to watch.

As to defunding the police NOT meaning defund the police? Firstly, the fact that it's an absolute messaging clusterfuck and that people are supposed to say what they mean, and mean what they say. Then pull in Antifa/BLM and what the rioters demand, versus what the more "intellectual" leftists say. Also explain what happens in areas that have cut funding. And just bring up the CHAZ fuckstickery that happened when no cops were allowed in. If they don't want to Literally Defund The Police, why are they claiming it?

It's all parts of a pyramid. You start pulling pieces out of the bottom, shit starts to fall apart. It's why the entirety of the left's belief structure is based on lockstep fervor.

Best of luck, man. I know you're going to need it. Take it slowly and introduce this shit, chip away at it.