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Comments (187)
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119
juicemoney9 119 points ago +119 / -0

I’m searching for IMMORTALITY

67
Konsaki 67 points ago +67 / -0

Eh, just go Democrat and you can have IMMORALITY.

23
ARfreedom 23 points ago +23 / -0

At least one's vote for democrats is immortal.

15
slimcoat 15 points ago +15 / -0

Less T... makes sense.

9
PepeHelicopterTours 9 points ago +9 / -0

If you're a republican you vote red for life. If you're a democrat, you vote blue forever.

2
deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
2
my_pw_is_password 2 points ago +2 / -0

The ultimate state of being cucked: Dead voting democrat.

1
deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
11
fthecoup 11 points ago +11 / -0

So many Americans have been infected with stupidity and can't be fixed.

9
Strike_Eagle784 9 points ago +9 / -0

Kek, just don't off yourself like the first Emperor of China, Qin Shi Huangdi. He went off to try, and find the secret to immortality; and died while taking a whole bunch of mercury.

13
Lurkers4Trump 13 points ago +13 / -0

See, that's what history says. The truth is, the guy all these criminals are taking orders from, the true man pulling all the strings, it's always been Qin Shi Huangdi.

5
Strike_Eagle784 5 points ago +5 / -0

Haha! Maybe he did find the secret, after all. Explains China's recent behavior, XD.

3
deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
3
__SILENT__MAJORITY__ 3 points ago +3 / -0

Kek

2
BloodyWolf 2 points ago +2 / -0

Apparently all that mercury helps to preserve a corpse really well. So the ancient Chinese weren't completely stupid ... they just were chasing their own tails with that.

8
NoahGav 8 points ago +8 / -0

I wish you the best of luck in your endevour.

3
deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
69
Rock_Flag_Eagle 69 points ago +69 / -0

Now excuse me while I get in my metal box on 4 wheels and go careening down the road to buy masks and food at a grocery with thousands of other people.

26
Error404 26 points ago +26 / -0

it better be electric or you are damning the earth with your CO2

23
Rock_Flag_Eagle 23 points ago +23 / -0

You're gosh darn right that I drive a coal-powered battery! For the environment, of course.

2
Error404 2 points ago +2 / -0

it would be funny if it wasn't so damn pathetic how many people don't realize how much diesel is burned to procure the materials for batteries and whatnot for their tesla or other electric "earth-saving" bullshit. It's not just the front end energy, it's all the energy on the back end when the batteries/components are past their lifespan.

19
TheEmperorProtects 19 points ago +19 / -0

You need to stay home and stay safe and use amazon to get food!

23
deleted 23 points ago +23 / -0
14
TheEmperorProtects 14 points ago +14 / -0

Did you just call indigenous Americans “savages”?!?! How absolutely dare you

But seriously I wouldn’t give a shit if these people never left their houses again. I just don’t want to hear from them or for them to have any power over other people

14
my_pw_is_password 14 points ago +14 / -0

But that’s the problem. The Zoom class that rolls out of bed straight into their meetings, get their food delivered, want to oppose their view on the world on others.

The actual working class that’s sweating 10 hours a day in those masks breathing their own CO2, to enabled said arrogant Zoom class, are fed up with the Zoom class telling others how society should be run.

Covid has made the coastal elites even more out of touch with reality, even more woke socially justice outrage through their CNN/Twitler feeds, more tyrannical. While the actual economic backbone of society gas gad enough of their bullshit!

STAND UP AND DONT TAKE IT ANY LONGER

3
Jackdagger 3 points ago +3 / -0

I'm starting to think it was never out of touchness its intentional. Their grandmas and grandpas almost to a man have been running things behind the scenes for generations. They fucked up with the internet because they thought they were going to leverage it for control and instead it took their ability to control away because ever growing groups who realized they weren't crazy and were being manipulated finally had a place to congregate

6
BloodyWolf 6 points ago +6 / -0

My Mayflower ancestors were badasses ... so why did they come over on a ship named after a flower?

6
Gluteusmax 6 points ago +6 / -0

Because they weren't little bitches concerned with silly worries about what anyone else thought about them, or the ship they sailed on.

They had brass balls the size of grapefruits to sail to an unsettled wilderness on a one-way trip. Either glory and success or death.

"Hey John, what are our descendants going to think about this gay name of a ship?" "Shut up and hand me another moldy biscuit"

1
BloodyWolf 1 point ago +1 / -0

Fucking awesome. 10/10.

11
50blessings 11 points ago +11 / -0

Be careful! If you go outside you could be struck by lightning! :o Or you might be a victim of interracial crime! Oh wait, shit, it's racist to talk about that!

Give me liberty, or give me death. Fuck Newsom, I'm eating Thanksgiving dinner this year WITH FAMILY.

3
my_pw_is_password 3 points ago +3 / -0

*At 60 miles an hour

66
BoatingAccident 66 points ago +66 / -0

Only racists leave their basements.

19
Liberty4All 19 points ago +19 / -0

We don't have basements in Florida.

Maybe that's why DeSantis won't lock us down again. We have no basements, therefore we are always outside of our basements, ergo we are all racists. And as racists we deserve to catch the CCP Virus and die.

But damnit, it's just not working out that way. After all of these months, they still have much higher death rates in New York!

1
ParadigmShift2070 1 point ago +1 / -0

Don't you guys have a solid walled bathroom in the middle of the house that doubles as hurricane shelter?

2
Liberty4All 2 points ago +2 / -0

No, not really. Most houses in Florida are wood frame on concrete slabs with no special shelter rooms. Bathrooms often have a window or skylight.

If you don't have a windowless bathroom with no skylight, it's safer to shelter in a windowless hallway, utility room, or a walk-in closet if your house is taking damage in a hurricane. My family spent Hurricane Michael in a hallway.

But water (storm surge) actually kills a lot more people than wind. People in areas susceptible to storm surge need to GTFO when they are told to evacuate.

Having said that, if you're near the coast and there is a Cat 4 or 5 storm headed your way, even if you're not in danger of storm surge flooding, I would leave.

Even if your house survives, you're looking at weeks if not months without utilities, and weeks of difficulty getting even the most basic supplies (food, clean water, ice, hygiene items, medicines, gas, pet food, etc.). Trust me: it's not fun.

12
ArticleISection10 12 points ago +12 / -0

checkmate

9
Bullet3250 9 points ago +9 / -0

KEK

7
plastic_Strawman 7 points ago +7 / -0

I don't have a basement.

5
Homemade-Soap 5 points ago +5 / -0

That doesn't make you any less racist, bigot.

52
justinjfit 52 points ago +52 / -0

this quarantine bs is going to backfire. It will only make the immune system weaker.

25
CahalTheMad 25 points ago +25 / -0

And the fake news media purposely ignores the 99.8% recovery and only "reports" on infection counts. This is why so many dipshits are afraid; they think there is no recovery and death is guaranteed. Oh, and if someone doesn't die from covidhoax then the belief is "they were never infected to begin with."

12
mnguy12000 12 points ago +12 / -0

MUUHHHH cases are rising! MUH DEATHS ARE RISING. SHUT IT DOWN.. 99.97 survive! Shut up, don't you care about grandma!

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deleted 9 points ago +9 / -0
1
Error404 1 point ago +1 / -0

tell people to stop dying from preventable heart related diseases also... 600,000 each year

1
Error404 1 point ago +1 / -0

PRE VENT ABLE

8
TheEmperorProtects 8 points ago +8 / -0 (edited)

Adults normally get 2-3 colds a year and often don’t know they have them. Infection counts are so misleading without talking a recovery rates

7
Scorpion 7 points ago +7 / -0

Tons of people are dying though!! Not as many as the flu, and the next brisk wind would have knocked them over and killed them as well, but they died while having covid so that means they died because of covid!

17
Mooma 17 points ago +17 / -0

And everyone is gaining weight, we'll have a diabetes epidemic in 5 years.

16
Liberty4All 16 points ago +16 / -0

655,000 people die of heart disease in the US every year.

Quick, let's lock everybody in their homes, not let them go outside to exercise, close down all the stores and malls, and keep them too afraid to even walk through a grocery store to get food. Instead they can have everything delivered or pick it up curbside or at the drive-through.

It's for their health and safety, don'tcha know!

6
TheOneWhoKnocks 6 points ago +6 / -0

655,000 people die of heart disease in the US every year.

Not anymore. According to my Dominion tabulator, 10,000 people die of heart disease and 645,000 people die of COVID every year.

1
Error404 1 point ago +1 / -0

also, left out the most important part imo is "preventable"

fucking take a walk or ride a bike. stop being a fuckin potato. eat semi-healthy.

2
Liberty4All 2 points ago +2 / -0

That was my point - the lockdowns are discouraging exercise and encouraging bad eating habits.

People are responsible for their own health. But the reality is that most people take the path of least resistance and are strongly influenced by what they see on TV.

The CCP virus restrictions make it more inconvenient to exercise. The media fearmongering and makes it feel safer to sit on the couch and order fast food than to go to the grocery store to buy healthier food to cook. That has a real impact on the diet and exercise habits of the population.

8
MakeAmericaLegendary 8 points ago +8 / -0

Don’t we already?

6
deleted 6 points ago +6 / -0
2
Error404 2 points ago +2 / -0

Fredo would like to know your location. ACCEPT?

3
reddeadpill 3 points ago +3 / -0

That’s intentional.

Prepare for more screeching about “free” healthcare when all the side effects of lockdowns start showing themselves.

1
TripleBlack 1 point ago +1 / -0

That's the plan.

And mask makes you sicker.

31
stop_the_sniff 31 points ago +31 / -0

We can’t leave until every germ on earth is dead. Nobody can ever get sick again

17
de9ebkmd7 17 points ago +17 / -0

Our only chance is to push the earth into the sun and burn up all germs. Then we can go outside again and go about our daily lives.

3
TripleBlack 3 points ago +3 / -0

If we put all the nukes and rockets in one spot and point them towards the ground, then wait until night time, and lite them all at one, in theory we could move the Earth towards the sun and rid the planet of THE COVID.

12
PromiseImNotASpook 12 points ago +12 / -0

No joke, this is going to be what they go for next. We are never coming out of lockdown or the mask mandates. Once corona virus goes away they will focus their attention on our weakened immune systems and new strains of the flu. This needed to be stopped before it started. It's never going to end.

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deleted 8 points ago +8 / -0
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PromiseImNotASpook 8 points ago +8 / -0

Economies won't last that long. Restaurants and event promoters are dropping left and right. Worst part is, many of these businesses support this shit, so it's hard to feel sympathy for them.

8
Liberty4All 8 points ago +8 / -0

Yeah...most of my family is based, but I heard that one of my nieces and her boyfriend supported Biden/the Democrats. I shook my head sadly when I heard that, because she is in property management (she manages mostly condos and vacation homes) and he works in the restaurant industry.

Talk about shooting yourself in the foot!

3
deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
2
reddeadpill 2 points ago +2 / -0

There will be global consequences. All the people virtue signaling about the third world fail to realize how fucked those people are going to be when the 1st world economies collapse.

3
localhost 3 points ago +3 / -0

We are becoming Quarians.

26
boomerpro17 26 points ago +26 / -0

well it's obvious the virus has been drawn out long enough for the vaccines to be prepared and widely distributed... same as how the election got drawn out just enough for Biden to "find" mysterious votes...

11
deleted 11 points ago +11 / -0
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deleted 4 points ago +4 / -0
24
darthmatt005 24 points ago +24 / -0

Just got diagnosed with Covid today. Didn't even know i was sick.

I'm not trying to make light of how serious it could be for the vulnerable, but i kind of expected more plague in my plague.

20
deleted 20 points ago +20 / -0
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Killer 10 points ago +10 / -0

lmao sounds like a shitty twilight zone opening

11
KekistanPM 11 points ago +11 / -0

If you worked where I work and you announced that, people would treat you like you have one foot in the grave. You'd get so much sympathy that you'd probably vomit and then they'd say Covid made you vomit.

4
genghis_khek 4 points ago +5 / -1

I tested positive last Thursday and so far it's a joke. Lost my sense of smell and that's about it. Hope you stay well pede.

21
MAGAyar 21 points ago +21 / -0

I like how the same people who yell “wear a mask so you don’t give it to your elderly grandma!” are the same people who also yell “God I can’t wait until all these old people are dead so they stop voting Republican!”

Boy if they don’t have cognitive dissonance.

6
MagaroniNCheese 6 points ago +6 / -0

And then they killed the old people with Covid complications, intentionally, to push the lockdown scare and also end up with a nice new set of names to vote Democrat.

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Thekraken 21 points ago +21 / -0

Nope has to be 105%

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MAGALogic 19 points ago +19 / -0

Biden math. This checks out.

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deleted 8 points ago +8 / -0
2
guest13 2 points ago +2 / -0

So people coming back from the dead.....and voting? Thank god it has come to pass and we can go on with our lives......

Wait....

17
XirWokeMasterCuck 17 points ago +17 / -0

We cant get to normal till its gone. Dont you care about lives ?

  • puffs vape
  • drives car
  • aborts baby
  • embraces socialism
  • threatens lives of conservatives
13
Iseekekpeople 13 points ago +13 / -0

The morning 'news' was pushing the scamdemic hard today.

10
MAGALogic 10 points ago +10 / -0

It is a coordinated push one week out from Thanksgiving.

14
UpTrump 14 points ago +14 / -0

They're trying to make everyone forget about the fraud

7
Shakakka99 7 points ago +7 / -0

BINGO, bitch.

7
MAGALogic 7 points ago +7 / -0

True.

They are trying to change the narrative away from election fraud, control people's freedom of movement, and also cripple the economy once President Trump starts his second term.

4
Genericwhitemale 4 points ago +4 / -0

Why anyone watches the news at this point is beyond me. Just complete fear mongering propaganda.

3
Cyer6 3 points ago +3 / -0

It's being pushed hard everywhere. They're going full-throttle on it for some reason.

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deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
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ArticleISection10 12 points ago +12 / -0

they say these vaccines have a 95%+ success rate.. is that for the .5% that don't survive? or is that for the 95% that can defeat it on their own?

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TheOneWhoKnocks 7 points ago +7 / -0

Interestingly enough, the vaccine has a 95% success rate while COVID has a 99.97% survival rate. Seems like you're safer just not taking the vaccine.

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deleted 6 points ago +6 / -0
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mnguy12000 4 points ago +4 / -0

Good point. My guess it those who would die, will die anyway, with or without the vaccine.

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LibDestroyer50000 3 points ago +3 / -0

We all will die, eventually.

11
QueensOwn 11 points ago +11 / -0

Don’t look now But NYC is closing schools starting Thursday.

CoVid 2 Shutdown 2 is about to start! I mean NY needs to justify the Biden bailout somehow!

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MAGALogic 9 points ago +9 / -0

This is a sign that they know Trump won the election.

6
QueensOwn 6 points ago +6 / -0

I pray to God you are right Pede.

10
KekistanPM 10 points ago +10 / -0

"Life is precious so I'm going to spend every waking moment trying to hide at home in misery and fear that I could die."

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Solar24 8 points ago +8 / -0

Well guess I'll die then

8
freedom2520 8 points ago +8 / -0

No, that won't be good enough, because that will just be an "effective" rate. There will still be the millions of people in the world that Trump previously killed, so we won't be able to go back until they are all brought back from the dead to live out the remaining time they would have if orange man wasn't born.

8
Asshat4Congress 8 points ago +8 / -0

3 years ago, I heard about a fatal car accident, I have not left my basement since, I sure hope we can get cars to be 100% safe soon... I need TP!

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deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
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The_Spicy_Memes_Chef 5 points ago +5 / -0

I’ll most likely survive this virus...time to end it all

5
ARfreedom 5 points ago +5 / -0

Infection Survival Rates:
0-19 years: 99.997%
20-49 years: 99.98%
50-69 years: 99.5%
70+ years: 94.6%
https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/hcp/planning-scenarios.html
https://archive.is/FFR3g
Dated 09-10-2020

5
bobobob 5 points ago +5 / -0

Leading causes of death for adults aged 35-44:

  • Poisonings 16,962
  • Heart Diseases 10,532
  • Suicides 7,521
  • Traffic Accidents 6,886
  • CHINA VIRUS 4,426
  • Homicides 3,304
  • Liver Disease 3,108

CDC death stats from 2018 (latest I could find) and China virus deaths from 2020

1
ARfreedom 1 point ago +1 / -0

CDC is annoyingly slow at updating their stats. 2018 is probably the most recent yearly report on those numbers.

3
deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
5
Phil_DeGraves 5 points ago +5 / -0

IT'S NOW LIKE THE SEASONAL FLU! NOOOOOOO, WHAT'S THE POINT OF CONTINUING ON?!?!?!?!

What gullible retards.

4
Zadok 4 points ago +4 / -0

We will never reach 100% survival as long as they count suicide as a Covid-19 death.

4
Troy4Trump 4 points ago +4 / -0

That survival rate is eerily similar to Biden’s 4am vote percentage.

4
deleted 4 points ago +4 / -0
4
LonelyLadypedeSF_CA 4 points ago +4 / -0

There is a 100% chance YOU'RE ALL GOING TO DIE !!! *

*eventually

4
BaconBun11 4 points ago +4 / -0

We'll probably have to wait until it's a 101% survival rate. People need to come back to life, just to be sure it's worth the risk to come out.

3
deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
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DeboonkedFact 4 points ago +4 / -0

I was going to go pee but I may clip my toe on the doorframe. Better not go, I'll just stay here and hold it. I'm sure there are no downsides to this plan

2
deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
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T150 3 points ago +3 / -0

"Lockdown until zero deaths"

And then get ready for "Mask Season" to be pushed on us in the future.

3
sociopathix 3 points ago +3 / -0

"On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero." -- Chuck Palahniuk

3
Frumplmeist311 3 points ago +3 / -0

This covid crap has got to go. On CNN a nurse was being interviewed and she said covid killed her entire town. I am not joking about this. That type of shit people believe.

3
Demandred 3 points ago +3 / -0

Better face diaper up while sitting alone in your locked, air-circulated car.

ThE maSkS PrOTecT OthERs

1
deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
3
Sabina 3 points ago +3 / -0

Well, if you go Democrat your vote, at least , will go on forever.

3
phil_d_snutz 3 points ago +3 / -0

You're only allowed to die from abortion, drugs, depression, suicide, assisted suicide, murder, etc. Covid is too new so you're not allowed to die from it yet you bigot.

3
sleazysaxsolo 3 points ago +3 / -0

Has the governor given us permission to take a shit yet?

3
Zadok 3 points ago +3 / -0

Only if you wear a mask and lock the bathroom door.

3
thebigbear 3 points ago +4 / -1

You are accurate and yes we are maybe, just maybe, having a down time but that is because we want as Pedes to see the good in ALL people and believe people are good at heart.

WELLLLL, GROW UP. SLASH BURN DESTROY every Libertard at every corner. Take no prisoners and give no quarter. This is your country you are fighting for. Get a pair or get out of the way. You are on the TRUMP TRAIN and there are no breaks or brakes. When they call you a RACIST you call them a PEDIPHILE. When they say they are not a pediphle you say ALL DEMOCRATS ARE PEDIPHILES and then start listing off all the players. Same with any BLM or ANTIFIA scum. Same tactic, same results. Pedes FIGHT TO WIN AND WIN AGAIN. We have you back but you have to have a backbone and use it.

WWG1WGA

2
123breadman 2 points ago +2 / -0

It's one deadly case of the sniffles.

2
mnguy12000 2 points ago +2 / -0

Our dipshit GOV just locked us down for 4 weeks. No gym, Restaurants, schools or sports.

0
deleted 0 points ago +1 / -1
2
grndmrshlgando 2 points ago +2 / -0

even if literally nobody died they would falsify deaths (like they've been doing anyway) and lock you down regardless. the virus isn't the problem. the government is.

2
Mooma 2 points ago +2 / -0

I'd wait at least 2 weeks after hitting the 100% mark.

Or do we need to wait till it's at 105%, like some counties in Michigan?

2
Gwoz8881 2 points ago +3 / -1

There’s more to health than just the body. It’s body and mind. An unhealthy mind is just as detrimental as an unhealthy body. Lockdowns and forcing masks on everyone due to a 99+% survival rate is destroying everyone’s mind. Take control of your lives pedes

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deleted 5 points ago +5 / -0
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grndmrshlgando 3 points ago +3 / -0

not forcing shit on me. fuck off with that paper mask bullshit. what are you gonna do call the cops? you think they're gonna come out here to find someone in a store not wearing a mask? touch me and I'll slug you

0
Gwoz8881 0 points ago +1 / -1

That’s the spirit

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deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
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Peashout 2 points ago +2 / -0

Stan... Stan! Listen, I've got the coronavirus. The only hope I have is for you to get th cure. Can you do that for me son?

"Ya sure dad, what's the cure?"

Chicken noodle soup, and Gatorade. Hurry son!

2
Cloudrdr 2 points ago +2 / -0

"On a long enough timeline the survival rate for everyone drops to zero"

Zero Hedge masthead statement.

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deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
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my_pw_is_password 2 points ago +2 / -0

Ban civilian cars!!! They are Dangerous!!!

2
trump2016au 2 points ago +2 / -0

I want perfection! Damn it!

2
veteran299 2 points ago +2 / -0

this is like banning driving in order to reduce car accident deaths

2
nomoreprinkles 2 points ago +2 / -0

HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE DEATH RATE FOR AGING??

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deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
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Bidens_leg_hair 2 points ago +2 / -0

I think that's the survival rate after you get covid. So the overall rate of surviving covid after leaving your house is much much higher, since you have to contract it first.

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deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
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deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
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malooch 2 points ago +2 / -0

Where does one find the 99.97% number? Not that I doubt it in the least I just wanna have it up my sleeve in case an sjw gives me the ol BUT WHAT ARE YOUR SOURCES

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deleted 4 points ago +4 / -0
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Lagerisms 2 points ago +2 / -0

Table 1. Parameter Values that vary among the five COVID-19 Pandemic Planning Scenarios.

https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/hcp/planning-scenarios.html https://archive.is/FFR3g

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Lagerisms 1 point ago +1 / -0

It is actually 99.997% for ages 0-19 by the way. The mortality ratio for the current best estimate scenario is 0.00003 -- this is the ratio (not percentage) of dying if you actually contract the disease and show symptoms according to the CDC.