So sorry to hear you are going through all that. You have come to the right place for support and comfort. I've had my share of ups and downs, but I can not say I've experienced anything like what you are experiencing. It's not easy to feel strong sometimes. But I pray that you can continue to hold on to who you are and to pull from what you've learned to move on when the time is right. Love and hugs at this difficult time, pede. xoxo