NO ONE NEEDS A PITCHFORK! Pitchforks are heavy, they're hard to aim, and you don't need 30 teeth on a single handle. Look fat, buy yourself a double-handled rake, wave it in the air two times, and I promise you, there won't be any more trouble.
Buy a muzzle loader or an old dragoon revolver. You can have them shipped right to your door. Then when that deer walks on your property you can blow a softball sized hole in it!
Don't own a gun? No problem, take one from a body.
We will make sure plenty are available!!!
I'm a fan of framing hammers.
NO ONE NEEDS A PITCHFORK! Pitchforks are heavy, they're hard to aim, and you don't need 30 teeth on a single handle. Look fat, buy yourself a double-handled rake, wave it in the air two times, and I promise you, there won't be any more trouble.
It’s honestly more fun to gut a commie democrat from navel to neck. Hang their end trails like Christmas lights.
And a scythe would be good
Buy a muzzle loader or an old dragoon revolver. You can have them shipped right to your door. Then when that deer walks on your property you can blow a softball sized hole in it!
Or an "idea" that you're not a fan of.