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Comments (41)
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13
TXBeeLady 13 points ago +13 / -0

People forget that we’re the only state in the union that was not a territory first. We were our own Republic. Secession is never off the table.

We ain’t scared.

10
The_General_Patton 10 points ago +20 / -10

So Arizona and New Mexico are The Taint and California is The Asshole.

17
Those_Who_Wander [S] 17 points ago +17 / -0

ROFL. Which would also make Florida the bid dick. The analogy is perfect.

5
Precocious13 5 points ago +5 / -0

This is funny, I was born in Texas, and moved to Florida in highschool, apparently I only hang out in the country's crotch.

5
Gulleyfoyleismyname 5 points ago +5 / -0

It's warmer in the crotch.

We in Florida always called Atlanta the festering asshole of America.

We LOVE Georgians but Atlanta ain't Georgia!

0
The_General_Patton 0 points ago +10 / -10

Florida is the uncut head of America's cock.

9
PantsJihad 9 points ago +9 / -0

We're just pointing at Cuba. Menacingly.

1
deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
2
Lurking-My-Life-Away 2 points ago +2 / -0

Yes. New Mexico is a taint.

7
GenericInsult 7 points ago +7 / -0

Texan here. Mine's bigger than yours.

 

 

 

 

(Except Alaska)

2
acasper 2 points ago +2 / -0

Don’t want to anger them.

6
Covfefe_Injection 6 points ago +6 / -0

As the only state of the union that can legally have its own navy is filled with sea men.

6
BulletsForTeethORG 6 points ago +6 / -0

... AND WE'VE GOT THE BIGGEST BALLS OF THEM ALL!!!

3
ABQKel 3 points ago +3 / -0
3
tdwinner2020 3 points ago +3 / -0

And Florida is America's giant penis.

3
basedBlumpkin 3 points ago +3 / -0

Thank you, I will now be using this line forever

2
Those_Who_Wander [S] 2 points ago +2 / -0

You're welcome. Please do.

3
ProphetBoi 3 points ago +3 / -0

Laughed SUPER hard at this

3
Pleepleus 3 points ago +3 / -0

San Francisco Bay and surrounding area is the asshole. Smells like it too. Socal is the prostate.

2
ammonthenephite 2 points ago +2 / -0

Climate is about right, lol.

2
deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
2
Ebbie8708 2 points ago +2 / -0

It gets humid and hot enough to be Satan's balls in the summer.

2
DigginDeeper 2 points ago +2 / -0

Yay! We're the penis...

2
TexasSupreme 2 points ago +2 / -0

Can confirm

2
SkeletorsTeeth 2 points ago +2 / -0

No blue balls in Texas....it gets all the action

2
Joaniev9 2 points ago +2 / -0

Florida is the dong

2
jts1 2 points ago +2 / -0

LOL...that's some big swinging balls!

2
DarkSamus61 2 points ago +2 / -0

Probably why we require so much land too.

2
Tuarac 2 points ago +2 / -0

NM here. i feel like the taint...

1
Those_Who_Wander [S] 1 point ago +1 / -0

You're not as tainty as AZ right now at least.

1
Tuarac 1 point ago +1 / -0

thanks for this

2
dismybrowseacct 2 points ago +2 / -0

We used to have a saying in Ohio that it was "The heart of it all". I'd love to see a big sign while entering Texas that says "The balls of America" with a big picture of Ted Cruz and his beard laughing. Maybe some writing in the Zodiac handwriting for good measure.

2
Those_Who_Wander [S] 2 points ago +2 / -0

Billboards aren't actually that expensive. Someone should do it >,<

2
Illinois4Trump 2 points ago +2 / -0

Florida is the big pp

2
Tallsie 2 points ago +2 / -0

Does that make Florida the Dick?

2
deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
2
HalfBreedSupremacist 2 points ago +2 / -0

ANSWER: Because it's fucking carrying this country right now.

2
KamalasSnatch 2 points ago +2 / -0

We are the Big Dick of Freedom

2
mixednuts86 2 points ago +2 / -0

Time to get America's big dick Florida in on the action!

1
Porkbut 1 point ago +2 / -1

I mean, it’s literally the balls and pp if you look at it.

1
sacrebleu 1 point ago +1 / -0

Doesn't it look like 👆?