DH is a good man and a strong Trump supporter, but his way of manifesting is to embrace the negative. So I'm hearing things like, "That Supreme Court case isn't going anywhere," and "I predict a Biden inaugural." Needless to say, this is really hard to live with, since I'm the positive type.
Any advice for how to live with such a person without enacting the silent treatment?
Understand, most have been programmed to "view" failure, so was I! Just enjoy the thrill of victory when this occurs!!! Until, support...
Yeah, alot of anti-doomers are setting themselves up to have their worlds shattered if they are wrong. Very similar to how leftists 4 years ago had their worlds shattered when their queen lost.
This is the big mistake of the Pessimist. You've convinced yourself that feeling miserable and spreading that misery to others somehow lessens the impact of disappointment or tragedy.
It doesn't. It just means you've increased the amount of time you and those around you have been miserable. Rather than being a beacon of hope that others can look to in times of trouble, you have become a seed of discontent that wastes what time you have to enjoy your life by constantly presuming the worst.
What profit is there in getting to say, "I told you so" when the broader impact of your negativity is to have increased the number of people willing to give up and give in before the fight is even over?
The Optimists will not have their world "shattered". The Optimist will keep right on being optimistic and finding the positive angle to approach life in the future no matter the outcome.
It's the doomers that act as though the world is literally over if the best possible outcome fails to pan out. If the big danger of the future bad thing happening is that it will crush people's spirits, then all the pessimist has done is surrender their spirit early. It's the emotional equivalent of an under achiever not answering questions on a test because they'd rather be seen as lazy than be proven stupid by getting the answers wrong.
EXACTLY!
It's hard work being the Optimist of the House. I play that role myself even though it really doesn't come naturally to me, but DW has a tendency towards paranoia and fear as a result of her upbringing.
Optimism is its own reward though. The goal isn't necessarily to convince the pessimist. The goal is to continue to act as a beacon of hope so that you can continue to enjoy the time you have together rather than wallowing in mutual misery waiting for the worst to happen.
I understand how exhausting it can be when you're trying to actively bring positivity into the household while your partner seems dead set on shooting down every bit of good news or message of hope that you bring, but try to understand that what your partner is actually bringing you is their fears.
You address one fear, and they just throw the next one at you, not really because they want to prove you wrong, but because they NEED you, the optimist, to help them get through all of their fears. You are their lighthouse shining through the storm. In the end, it's really about faith. The pessimist is experiencing a lack of faith, and they need you to help them recenter and refill their well.
So when it gets nearly overwhelming and you feel like your well of faith is also running dry, try not to look at them as they are in this moment of weakness and crisis of faith, but as the whole human being that has been with you through the years. Focus on the times that they have been there for you and used their personal strengths to make up for your personal weaknesses and know that eventually it will again be your turn to lean on them.
Worst case: if you're coming to the end of your ability to maintain a positive outlook in the face of their negativity, tactical retreat is perfectly acceptable. Just change the subject to something less taxing. Odds are, their mood will also improve once you get them off the topic and thinking about something else for a bit. Human beings really aren't designed to be constantly subjected to negativity the way we are by the advertising agency media. Get away from it together and focus on something else. Enjoy Christmas or whatever you do this time of year. Play games or watch old movies you both enjoy. Do the things you love to do together when politics isn't dominating your life.
That will do more to remind him of why he should be happy and optimistic about the future than any nuanced debate regarding election law.
This is the best advice I've heard yet. You might consider going into counseling . . .
Yea. Try to get over the fact that not everyone thinks exactly what you think, and that there are people in the world (MAGA included) who have their own opinions.
Once you accept that fact, you'll be fine.
The more I think about this, the better I like it.
IMO, do nothing. Stay strong, don't exacerbate by arguing. It'll shake out on January 20th. It's not that far away. I know it's tough, but you're tough enough to hold the line for Trump. You've got this.
Thanks. I needed that.
Very insightful! Thanks!
Encourage him to try speaking truth out loud (instead). For example, Trump won in a landslide, Trump will serve a second term, Trump is our president for 4 more years, USA! It's amazing the power of spoken word, especially truth. Truth breeds confidence!! The least he could do, is try! Keep the faith brother and never give up!! MAGA!!!
Assuming he would be there for you if Biden was fraudulently inaugurated, just be there to celebrate with him when Trump gets re-inaugurated. That shouldn't be an irreconcilable disagreement, and there is a nonzero chance that he could be right, given the reach of the swamp.
Yes, please!
over here we deport shills. Not sure what the real life application of that is... but all kidding aside, there are many pathways to a victory. A football analogy is Atl 28 NE 3 3rd quarter 8 minutes left for the super bowl a few years ago. Final score NE 34 Atl 28. It ain't over till Bill Barr sings.
Supreme Court does something. Either throw out the states ,or give it to the state legislatures to set their own delegates. With all the pressure we are putting on these folks hopefully they do the right thing. Another option is they invalidate those states which gives us a contested election a 26-22 victory in the house for Pres. Trump and VP hopefully is Pence. There is a possibility that someone defects on the Republican side but if so that would mean they'd find someone else to nominate.
Supreme Court doesn't do something. At this point I believe the EO from 2018 will be set into a place a storm of events where in which the election will be invalidated and insurrection act invoked. At this point there'd be no chance in hell that Biden is president. He'd be indicted with pretty much alot of the dems that perpetuated this fraud. The media also would be implicated.
The EO or insurrection act is not invoked. Then patriots will rise up as this has gone too long. We will bring our country back and eviscerate the other side. Not lefties in the population but those in power / elites. They don't stand a chance.
Forget 1-3. God is always in charge. This year the star of Bethlehem appears Dec. 21. There are no coincidences. And I know all of us are in prayer for this Good vs Evil fight to be resolved.
Beautiful (especially #4) and helpful. Thanks.