Nope, no luck. Got out of a long term relationship (that sorta turned my world upside down) with a dude (right-wing veteran that thinks BLM are domestic terrorists) several months ago who started dating a girl who is a BLM activist so I’m still silently dealing with that emotional confusion lol.
Loll we met on bumble (I shudder at the thought now) a few years ago. Moved together to a new state, had a little “family” of us and our cats. I was a huge Trump supporter before I met him and he was also a Republican so we’d watch a ton of right-wing videos/make fun of liberals/etc all the time. My best, best friend of 15 years was killed in a car accident in Oct 2019. I took that really hard, but thinking about getting married/buying a house/having kids was a good distraction and gave me something to look forward to. Because we lived far from friends/family and my best friend was gone, he was by far the closest person to me and we were always like best buddies on top of being in a relationship.
On best friend’s first birthday since she died, he came home from work and was acting weird. Up and walked out. On the 10 month anniversary (or whatever it’s called) of her death, he finalized the break up and came to get his stuff. Essentially, “it’s not you it’s me”, “i have issues to work out”, “i’ll never be what you deserve” and other cliches like that. He told me he was only with me the last year because she died (not sure why that was even relevant to tell me??), even though we were looking at houses back home and talking about getting married.
So I was left here in a house two hours away from everyone during a GlObAl FuCkInG PaNdeMic (only relevant cuz i can’t get a job and move back thanks to fat fuck pritzker). The loneliness basically ripped open the wounds from losing my best friend. It was like it happened all over again. She’s been there for every break up and this was by far the hardest one. I have other friends but no one nearly as close to me as she was. It just...really fucking sucks not having that friend that you can come to about ANYTHING. It was hell for a while (lost 20lbs from not having an appetite cuz stress), but since the election, I’ve focused all my energy on that and I’ve felt a lot better.
In hindsight, there were signs, but I’m very loyal and very forgiving and believe people are inherently good/mean what they say and I never give up on people close to me without exhausting all options. I’m okay now, just grieving her, which i don’t expect to go away any time soon. She loved my (now ex) boyfriend. First guy i dated that she actually liked. She was very protective over me and I laugh when I think about what she’d say about him now.
Sorry this is so long but if you read all this, I appreciate it. I ONLY CRIED A LITTLE, TOO. Not about that blm protester loving douche, just miss her so much.
Nope, no luck. Got out of a long term relationship (that sorta turned my world upside down) with a dude (right-wing veteran that thinks BLM are domestic terrorists) several months ago who started dating a girl who is a BLM activist so I’m still silently dealing with that emotional confusion lol.
Loll we met on bumble (I shudder at the thought now) a few years ago. Moved together to a new state, had a little “family” of us and our cats. I was a huge Trump supporter before I met him and he was also a Republican so we’d watch a ton of right-wing videos/make fun of liberals/etc all the time. My best, best friend of 15 years was killed in a car accident in Oct 2019. I took that really hard, but thinking about getting married/buying a house/having kids was a good distraction and gave me something to look forward to. Because we lived far from friends/family and my best friend was gone, he was by far the closest person to me and we were always like best buddies on top of being in a relationship.
On best friend’s first birthday since she died, he came home from work and was acting weird. Up and walked out. On the 10 month anniversary (or whatever it’s called) of her death, he finalized the break up and came to get his stuff. Essentially, “it’s not you it’s me”, “i have issues to work out”, “i’ll never be what you deserve” and other cliches like that. He told me he was only with me the last year because she died (not sure why that was even relevant to tell me??), even though we were looking at houses back home and talking about getting married.
So I was left here in a house two hours away from everyone during a GlObAl FuCkInG PaNdeMic (only relevant cuz i can’t get a job and move back thanks to fat fuck pritzker). The loneliness basically ripped open the wounds from losing my best friend. It was like it happened all over again. She’s been there for every break up and this was by far the hardest one. I have other friends but no one nearly as close to me as she was. It just...really fucking sucks not having that friend that you can come to about ANYTHING. It was hell for a while (lost 20lbs from not having an appetite cuz stress), but since the election, I’ve focused all my energy on that and I’ve felt a lot better.
In hindsight, there were signs, but I’m very loyal and very forgiving and believe people are inherently good/mean what they say and I never give up on people close to me without exhausting all options. I’m okay now, just grieving her, which i don’t expect to go away any time soon. She loved my (now ex) boyfriend. First guy i dated that she actually liked. She was very protective over me and I laugh when I think about what she’d say about him now.
Sorry this is so long but if you read all this, I appreciate it. I ONLY CRIED A LITTLE, TOO. Not about that blm protester loving douche, just miss her so much.
Hang in there...