"But I'm just following orders because I'm too Evil to not be okay with committing Evil in the first place. I just no longer hide it when I have permission."

That's every single cop/soldier that pathetically uses the excuse of "following orders." If you're okay with following those orders, YOU'RE EVIL. If you're not okay with it, yet you go along still (whatever other excuse you're using to allow them to control you), YOU'RE EVIL. If you're really not okay with it and just scared, well YOU'RE STILL WITH EVIL, just too much of a pussy to do any real harm.

There is NO being GOOD while remaining on the SIDE OF EVIL, start disobeying tyrants/Evil, or become one yourself.