well yes, saying Big Mike is a woman is not credible, but as far as looks go, that "dress" looks like some contraption you'd see in the maintenance room of an abandoned 1950s Albanian water treatment facility.
Honestly, who the hell would ever look at her, and that monstrosity she's wearing, and say, while honestly believing it, "oh yeah, that looks great! Absolutely stunning!" ? I mean, what is wrong with them?
Hahaha, thank you, I appreciate the comparison (at least from what I remember of his writing when I used to read his columns regularly, which has been a while)
When a "feminine" outfit's main result is to higglight that the wearer's figure is a bulky cylinder with zero hint of any aspect of "hourglass" I can't see how it could be considered anything other than an abject failure. Especially when she could have probably spent $5,000 less to achieve the same look.
The shame is that the dress would actually look absolutely stunning on someone of the right proportions, like Melania.
I can't believe a designer would be so clueless as to think that design would work on Michelle Obama. You'd think after the first fitting they'd go, nope let's go with something else. What a hot mess of garbage.
And how embarrassing that the fashion critics praised it. It's just so clearly objectively bad, it utterly destroys their credibility. Not to mention the condescending "soft bigotry of low expectations" of pretending she looks beautiful in that thing.
Ho Li Fuk... That is a man, with some crappy fake boobs, looking ridiculous in a yellow "dress". On the other hand, Melania is literally a super model.
Leftists are not only evil, they are also incredibly stupid - that is not a good combo by the way.
The MSM fashion reviewers secretly hate Michelle, because they almost always publicize her worst outfits and don't show her best ones.
And honestly, it's a real handicap to be a black woman who doesn't understand the interaction of fashion vs. what looks flattering on her. I know a lot of big battleship-type black women who always look stunning and gorgeous (albeit in a formidable way), because they know how to dress. Michelle's not fat, and she's reasonably fit. She should look becoming, even if she'll never be a beauty. Her advisers are not giving her value for money.
I mean, look at that yellow thing. It's not the worst color for Michelle, but there are other tones of yellow and gold that suit her better. All the little squares and the outlines on the bodice are meant to make skinny little models with no curves look like they have hips and boobs -- so of course they make a woman of normal proportions look huge and shapeless. Ugh.
Somebody keeps tricking Michelle into wearing prints and shapes that emphasize her worst points, and make all her good points look ugly. And the fashion industry goes right along, and so do the fashion reviewers. You can't tell me that they don't know what they're doing. It's like cooks spitting into food.
The general rule is that flattering clothes are all about fit and optical illusions. If you want something to look big, you have bright colors and busy patterns, and you cut things to billow or to push up, and so on. If you want an area to look smaller, you use darker colors, and you have as few patterns and lines as possible.
So with Michelle, you would expect her to wear a version of this dress that had a bodice that emphasized her boobs and fit their shape, possibly with all the silly tinsel, but then dropped away and was plain gold the rest of the way to the bottom hem. If there was tinsel, you'd expect it to hang vertically to make her look even taller, not horizontally (which makes you look wider) or in fuzzily bordered cubes (which is just horrible on almost everyone).
There might be some subtle shaping and coloring of her waist to make it look a tad thinner. But there isn't. In fact, if you erased the dress between her breasts and hips, and replaced it with plain fabric in a slightly darker color that subtly shaded into the colors above and below, it would look a lot better. Anything would.
And her hair is nice for her face, but there's something about it that doesn't fit with the dress and how it hangs on her shoulders. I think she needed to put it up or move it sideways somehow. Or, you know, pick a different dress.
My other thought is that maybe Michelle is secretly ashamed of being tall and doesn't think about how she can look too solid, so she keeps trying to de-emphasize her height and ends up making herself look wide instead.
I've seen Michelle IRL twice, albeit 10 years ago. Photos don't do her justice. She is indeed tall, but much more willow-y and graceful looking in person. I recall she had a 3/4 length cardigan on over a full tea length skirt. Both in a soft lavender. It was a very flattering look and made her look more hourglass and feminine. Her stylists during the WH days were much better than she has now.
This look is hideous. The cut of the bodice is so wrong for her muscular upper body and makes her look more mannish. Then the print and color are very unflattering, and styling of her hair doesn't do the look any favors. You must be onto something regarding the industry praising obviously bad looks.
Yeah, the dude with manshapes in a dress is looking better than the supermodel to the right.
Women will lie to your face and say you look good but talk shit about you behind your back. This is clearly the same thing but added spite for Melania.
I can't wait for a world where people mentally locked into puberty are shunned.
I don't know why anyone thought they had to photoshop Big Mike to make him less attractive, but you can see it's clearly altered in the waves of the left arm.
Big Mike dressed up as corn on the cob this Halloween I'm thinking.
I’ll eat your leftist ass like CORN ON THE COB
Corn cob was one bad dude back when Joe lived in the racial jungles.
It puts the razors in the rain barrel
Or else it gets the chain wrapped around its head again
What's wrong with Miahelle's forearm?
Come on man, I choose facts over truth.
To get em rusty!
Which...what? That would make it less sharp, unless your goal isn't to cut someone up and instead give them tetanus.
That is the only “logical” explanation.
Don't forget he learned about "roaches"
Whatever that means.
Little kids jumping on his lap.
That was corn pop, not corn cob. Different fellas.
Corn pop was a bad dude. Corn cob has the magic stick that makes Barack go drip drip.
Big mike fitt'n to throw his dick over his shoulder and leave.
Corn Pops dad, Corn Cob.
Have you heard Miel Bredouw's Carol of the Bells / Three 6 Mafia Slob on my Knob mashup?
"Slob on my knob, corn on the cob..."
Fitting for Big Mike here.
You think I wanna size 'em up, haul 'em up by a chain? CHOP CHOP CHOP CHOP CHOP CHOP!
We're gonna wrap our metaphysical hands around your stinkin' necks, globalists! AAAGGGHHHFHRHGHGH
Real lol!!!
scorn on the blob
Big Mike looks like a shitty Dalek cosplay.
Had to look this up but it is spot on!
Dalek 😆 spot on!
Barry's favorite meal!
well yes, saying Big Mike is a woman is not credible, but as far as looks go, that "dress" looks like some contraption you'd see in the maintenance room of an abandoned 1950s Albanian water treatment facility.
Honestly, who the hell would ever look at her, and that monstrosity she's wearing, and say, while honestly believing it, "oh yeah, that looks great! Absolutely stunning!" ? I mean, what is wrong with them?
Hey everybody, look at this! Dave Barry is a pede.
That is such a lovely sentence.
Hahaha, thank you, I appreciate the comparison (at least from what I remember of his writing when I used to read his columns regularly, which has been a while)
I read that sentence about 3 times - the first time. It's a gem.
The boobs aren't even in the right place. Monstrosity it is.
why do my eyes tell me that thing is ugly as shit.
The emperor wears no clothes story.
if the gown is that tight it doesnt look "incredible"
When a "feminine" outfit's main result is to higglight that the wearer's figure is a bulky cylinder with zero hint of any aspect of "hourglass" I can't see how it could be considered anything other than an abject failure. Especially when she could have probably spent $5,000 less to achieve the same look.
BIKE MIKE PHOTOSHOPPED HIMSELF TO LOOK LIKE A CHICK. LOOK AT HIS LEFT ARM. PHOTOSHOP CITY
Found the original and doesn't look photoshopped there. Not sure why OP's looks like it was. Either way it's ugly.
https://hips.hearstapps.com/hmg-prod.s3.amazonaws.com/images/image-from-ios-941-1574082541.png?resize=640:*
Cause the dress is sewn uneven. One side is bigger.
Do you think anyone actually thinks Big Mike is pretty?
Or are they all too scared of being called racists if they point out the "Michelle" is hideous
If mike were Republican, u'd know their true thoughts.
Ack! How? Oh, my bad, those are the same commies attracted to drag queens.
Shut your mouth, bigot! Xir arm is just broken in 4 places! It's called fAsHiOn
Alien from The Arrival
What the hell? That forearm looks bizarre
Some sort of absurdist mashup of a zeppelin, a chandelier, and a lake of piss.
And the headline is accurate. He DID look incredible: incredibly hideous.
I wouldn't use that dress to wrap my fucking GARBAGE.
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Big Mike's ding-a-ling.
It drills Obama night and day.
wrecks hussiens ass and flops like a fish
🤮🤮🤮
OoOoOoHh.... SpOnGebOb SqUaRePaNtS
Melania as beautiful and elegant as always.
She is our most beautiful First Lady ever. I hatez the way media has treated her. Our FLOTUS is one classy lady.
110 out of 100 men are going with Melania in the gunnysack over Michelle in a pallet of $100 bills.
I came here to say Guys that's obviously a photoshop. O.M.G. it's not!
Hint: if you don't have this body don't wear this dress:
https://autos.squibs.org/squib/7524347-michelle-obamas-glittering-yellow-gown-is-a-straight-up-work-of-art
Remember when Don Lemon said big Mike is more attractive than Melania? Of course a gay guy thinks a man is more attractive than a beautiful woman.
If that’s not enough proof, I don’t know what is!
😂
Michelle looks like Bugs Bunny dressed up like Brunhilda in "What's Opera Doc."
And I daresay Bugs looked better.
https://youtu.be/6jDcWAWRRHo
For anyone unfamiliar with the reference cartoon
LOL I remember watching that episode as a kid and totally forgot about it until now
So you didn't remember. 🤔
big mikes man pecs barely fill out that a cup
I thought it was photoshopped but it’s actually worse. https://www.popsugar.com/fashion/michelle-obama-sparkling-yellow-schiaparelli-gown-46912040
they nailed it
LOL! Embarrassingly pathetic 🤣
The shame is that the dress would actually look absolutely stunning on someone of the right proportions, like Melania.
I can't believe a designer would be so clueless as to think that design would work on Michelle Obama. You'd think after the first fitting they'd go, nope let's go with something else. What a hot mess of garbage.
And how embarrassing that the fashion critics praised it. It's just so clearly objectively bad, it utterly destroys their credibility. Not to mention the condescending "soft bigotry of low expectations" of pretending she looks beautiful in that thing.
They’re throwing lipstick on a pig and then want to give the pig an award for how stunning and beautiful it suddenly is
The color looks awful against her skin tone, too. That dress is for someone who either looks like Snow White or someone so black she's almost blue.
Fuck there's fake news and there's this.
Ho Li Fuk... That is a man, with some crappy fake boobs, looking ridiculous in a yellow "dress". On the other hand, Melania is literally a super model.
Leftists are not only evil, they are also incredibly stupid - that is not a good combo by the way.
Damn she doesn't skip chest day at the gym. The cups on the dress are an optical illusion.
who's her?
Did you just assume BIG MIKES gender ???
big mike identifies as a commie...you have to be a person to have a gender!
Found the Christian. Just kidding
Gaslighting at the nuclear level.
Big Mike, First Tranny.
Fact checkers have determined that the thing on the left is a dude
A man in a dress doesn’t really do it for me. In addition that that he’s one ugly fucking motherfucker.
Twinkie in a cage vs. class.
The MSM fashion reviewers secretly hate Michelle, because they almost always publicize her worst outfits and don't show her best ones.
And honestly, it's a real handicap to be a black woman who doesn't understand the interaction of fashion vs. what looks flattering on her. I know a lot of big battleship-type black women who always look stunning and gorgeous (albeit in a formidable way), because they know how to dress. Michelle's not fat, and she's reasonably fit. She should look becoming, even if she'll never be a beauty. Her advisers are not giving her value for money.
I mean, look at that yellow thing. It's not the worst color for Michelle, but there are other tones of yellow and gold that suit her better. All the little squares and the outlines on the bodice are meant to make skinny little models with no curves look like they have hips and boobs -- so of course they make a woman of normal proportions look huge and shapeless. Ugh.
Somebody keeps tricking Michelle into wearing prints and shapes that emphasize her worst points, and make all her good points look ugly. And the fashion industry goes right along, and so do the fashion reviewers. You can't tell me that they don't know what they're doing. It's like cooks spitting into food.
For the benefit of pedes who don't do fashion --
The general rule is that flattering clothes are all about fit and optical illusions. If you want something to look big, you have bright colors and busy patterns, and you cut things to billow or to push up, and so on. If you want an area to look smaller, you use darker colors, and you have as few patterns and lines as possible.
So with Michelle, you would expect her to wear a version of this dress that had a bodice that emphasized her boobs and fit their shape, possibly with all the silly tinsel, but then dropped away and was plain gold the rest of the way to the bottom hem. If there was tinsel, you'd expect it to hang vertically to make her look even taller, not horizontally (which makes you look wider) or in fuzzily bordered cubes (which is just horrible on almost everyone).
There might be some subtle shaping and coloring of her waist to make it look a tad thinner. But there isn't. In fact, if you erased the dress between her breasts and hips, and replaced it with plain fabric in a slightly darker color that subtly shaded into the colors above and below, it would look a lot better. Anything would.
And her hair is nice for her face, but there's something about it that doesn't fit with the dress and how it hangs on her shoulders. I think she needed to put it up or move it sideways somehow. Or, you know, pick a different dress.
My other thought is that maybe Michelle is secretly ashamed of being tall and doesn't think about how she can look too solid, so she keeps trying to de-emphasize her height and ends up making herself look wide instead.
Yes its a marvellous hot air balloon hun, wait what were you saying?!
Sorry I am just blown away at how beautiful Melania looks and can't take my eyes off her.
I've seen Michelle IRL twice, albeit 10 years ago. Photos don't do her justice. She is indeed tall, but much more willow-y and graceful looking in person. I recall she had a 3/4 length cardigan on over a full tea length skirt. Both in a soft lavender. It was a very flattering look and made her look more hourglass and feminine. Her stylists during the WH days were much better than she has now.
This look is hideous. The cut of the bodice is so wrong for her muscular upper body and makes her look more mannish. Then the print and color are very unflattering, and styling of her hair doesn't do the look any favors. You must be onto something regarding the industry praising obviously bad looks.
Sorry...looks bad because it's a dude.
I think the main problem is that they keep dressing him in women's clothing.
Trying to slim down those manly forearms. He’s a beast.
It's a fucking clown world.
When a Volvo parks next to a Ferrari
Volvo makes garbage trucks?
https://www.princemotorsusa.com/users/images/inventory/big/Trucks_266.jpg
Volvo FE - which still wears that dress better than Mike.
Michelle always makes me gag a little.
BBC will do that to you 🍆🍆
Thats a man, man!
Burnt Twinkie vs super model.
should have posted the real pic, not this lamely photoshopped one. the real picture is even worse. probably not linking this right but I don't know where to upload the pic
Michelle looks hideous. Also can't stand that little cultural appropriating faggot, Lin Well Miranda.
She is a god damned man
Orangutan titties vs Slav Barbie. Yeah I choose the latter
Michael's got a good tailor.
Nice pattern good heavy fabric hides his/her giant schlong very well.
M is wearing what looks like a lingerie made for a man. Oh wait...
Michael looks like a damn pineapple.
thats one rotten banana
Gros Michel
He looks horrific, like a corn cob hanging between two sausages
Yeah, the dude with manshapes in a dress is looking better than the supermodel to the right.
Women will lie to your face and say you look good but talk shit about you behind your back. This is clearly the same thing but added spite for Melania.
I can't wait for a world where people mentally locked into puberty are shunned.
Incredi'balls'
Why are they comparing Melania’s dress to a trash bag?
Dude, c'mon man.
🤡🤡🤡🤡🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I can't.
I don't know why anyone thought they had to photoshop Big Mike to make him less attractive, but you can see it's clearly altered in the waves of the left arm.
Melania is so gorgeous!
How Now Brown Cow
Wtf is michael wearing
THE SOW IS MINE...... Barry Obama