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54
PEDELICAN 54 points ago +54 / -0

Don't even comply at any point. Don't carry one with you if you think you'll have. deep blue zone here. I've been fighting back against 100% mask zombies. Tell them this isn't China, tell them you don't answer to the UN. Ask them if they want to wear the mask for the rest of their lives. Ask if they like wearing it all day. But tell them you're on their side and we need to fight back together.

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deleted 23 points ago +24 / -1
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phil_d_snutz 17 points ago +17 / -0

"I no speak Engrish."

23
ItsFunToSay-M-A-G-A 23 points ago +23 / -0

Carry some of those long skinny balloons in your pocket, and when they ask you to put a mask on, act like you don't understand, start gesturing really exaggeratedly like a mime, and slowly pull a balloon out. Then blow it up and make a balloon animal. As their jaw drops in stunned disbelief, hand it to them and walk right by and continue shoppping. Also, wear a black & white striped sweater. Beret optional.

🎉🎈🎪 Honk Honk! 🎪🎈🎉

3
Skogin 3 points ago +3 / -0

👍🤡🌍

2
TheJustin 2 points ago +2 / -0

When you hand them the balloon, which your mouth was just on, that's an act of bioterrorism and you will be arrested and sent to gitmo for the rest of your days.

3
Flipbarryfromreddit 3 points ago +4 / -1

This.

1
pedeypete 1 point ago +1 / -0

Especially if they don't have bilingual signs. I like this tactic.

3
Flipbarryfromreddit 3 points ago +3 / -0

Kek!!!!!

3
Cyer6 3 points ago +3 / -0

No not kek, it's... Que? No habla.

2
SonOf1776 2 points ago +3 / -1

domaa what?

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commies0ride0free 20 points ago +20 / -0

I just say “no thank you” no mater what they say. Do you need a madk? “No thank you.” You should wear a mask! “No thank you.” I haven’t had anyone ask me why I’m not where it in real life, and they are mandatory here. The employees are either too sheepish or apathetic to say anything after my initial “no thank you”

I always get huge smiles from the few other people I see without. Have convinced someone walking in with theirs in hand no to wear it as I was walking out to. Resistance baby ✊✊✊

5
deleted 5 points ago +7 / -2
2
Skogin 2 points ago +2 / -0

“Stop the spread? Like cream cheese?”

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deleted 4 points ago +4 / -0
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LoobintheToobin 4 points ago +4 / -0

So close! I got hit at the register once too. They said they would shop for me if I can’t wear one. Hahahahaha you realize I’m done shopping.... right? Sigh

2
Femprep 2 points ago +2 / -0

Or the employees really don’t give a shit, ask because their work requires it, then go back to ngaf. Not employees of the state, didn’t become a police officer to enforce government edicts.

16
Watermelons 16 points ago +16 / -0

Or, if you're not in a big box, say 'enjoy unemployment when your owner files for bankruptcy'

4
Skogin 4 points ago +4 / -0

Then I’ll see you in hell!