A voice crackles on from beneath you...
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help. But first, I'm going to need to do a little exploring. This won't hurt a bit."
Yeah, my orthodontist fooled me the first time with that one after I got my braces. "Shouldn't feel any pain, just a bit of pressure." No, it was fucking painful.
The government will NOT get my anal print. Ever.
They already have mine from...
I've said too much.
And your “O” face
Not to mention your constipation face every time you bring your phone to the john.
Can’t get an anal print if it’s a colon rose. - thinking meme
If you want an anal print, just take a picture of congress.
I too am a Government abduction survivor, have you any idea what they wanted with the cows?
They where checking thyroids for radioactive isotopes... Fallout from nuclear testing...
Do you want to star in a Mapplethorpe coffee table book? Because this is how you star in a Mapplethorpe coffee table book.
"Sorry, sir. In order to let you on this flight I'll need to see your covid passport and do a deep scan of your anal print."
Keep that cephalopod 🦑 away from my anus
Do not wipe your anus with the ink-pad.
Place the ink-pad directly onto the anus using gentle pressure.
Ensure anus is clean before applying the ink-pad, fecal particles may produce an inaccurate anal-reading.
For best results wax the anus prior to applying, as hair will also produce an inaccurate anal-print.
Thank you.
Oh nooo, time for diarrheaaaaaaa
"Just gotta check you're asshoe"
A voice crackles on from beneath you... "I'm from the government and I'm here to help. But first, I'm going to need to do a little exploring. This won't hurt a bit."
Yeah, my orthodontist fooled me the first time with that one after I got my braces. "Shouldn't feel any pain, just a bit of pressure." No, it was fucking painful.
I don’t think your orthodontist is supposed to be doin anything down there lol
Next thing, I wake up, pants unbuttoned!
Yeah, please just arrest these perverts NOW, thank you!
Money well spent if you ask me!