To my subjects, I will be disbursing funds via a stimulus package in the guise of relief for Coronavirus. It is my duty to ensure the success and integration of all of my subjects. As such, it is hereby ordered that you use those funds to purchase the means to learn Mandarin.

Without this language, you will fail in society. If you fail in society, your family will have to take up the slack and also handle the fines associated with this transgression. Furthermore, they will also be responsible for paying your employer due to the lost labor/profits.

Due your part, protect your family!

Chairman Joe