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posted ago by kamalashugebutthole ago by kamalashugebutthole +703 / -1

I'm seeing too many people saying that Federal Commie Faggots (a.k.a. the FBI) are showing up at their house and Patriots are talking to them. Under no circumstances should you talk to Feds.

They are trained to gain your trust. They are going to act friendly, like they just want to have a conversation or that they are based and can relate to you. I don't know how you haven't learned in the last four years that FBI commie faggots are not your friends, but it is time to learn it now. They are not there to have tea and chat. They are there to gather evidence to charge you with a federal crime. There are three possibilities when a Federal Commie Faggot shows up at your door:

One: they have nothing on you and are fishing for you to incriminate yourself.

Two: they have some stuff on you, but not enough to arrest you and are trying to get you to incriminate yourself.

Three: they have enough evidence to arrest you and are looking for you to make their case easy by incriminating yourself.

That's it. Think about, why else are they there?

If they show up and don't have cause to arrest you, the only thing you say is: "Kindly get off my property" and shut your fucking door. Nothing else. Don't yell at them. Don't make a scene. Don't confirm or deny you were in DC. Don't confirm or deny that you support the current legitimate President of the United States Donald John Trump. Don't confirm or deny that you hate Chairman Briben and the Blowjob Queen. Don't call them Federal Commie Faggots.

Shut the fuck up. That isn't the time to discuss your opinions. "Kindly get off of my property." That's it.

If they have enough to arrest you and you are in fact arrested, again DON'T TALK TO THE FEDERAL COMMIE FAGGOTS. The only thing you say is: "I would like my lawyer." After you are arrested, they are going to try scare you and make you think that if you talk to them, they may let you go. They may threaten you in other ways. THEY ARE FULL OF SHIT. Talking to them is not going to help your situation and can only hurt you. Again, "I would like my lawyer."

TLDR - **DON'T TALK TO THE FEDERAL COMMIE FAGGOTS UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. **

Comments (61)
sorted by:
46
TEXinLA 46 points ago +46 / -0

Miranda Rights not required.

Anything that you say to the FBI can be used against you as a perjury trap.

No swearing in required.

23
becray3point0 23 points ago +23 / -0

ASK IF YOU ARE UNDER ARREST. NO, then Shut the Front Door.

20
PatriotChang 20 points ago +20 / -0

This and NEVER EVER speak to any type of law enforcement without a lawyer. Keep your mouth shut.

22
Lord_Yeezus 22 points ago +22 / -0

So you mean I shouldn’t invite them in for coffee and ask them about their day?

25
kamalashugebutthole [S] 25 points ago +25 / -0

I saw a post early when somebody said that he invited them into his house. What the fuck? Don't even invite them on the porch. They can stand on the sidewalk or side of the street if they want to watch me shut the door in their commie faces.

13
Joesf23 13 points ago +13 / -0

Are you serious? Fucking hell people on are side still dont get it.

16
ISTApackagingguy 16 points ago +16 / -0

No. Never talk to law enforcement without an attorney president. If you do not have an attorney tell them to come back when you do. Exert the rights guaranteed by the Constitution. Reference: Richard Jewell. A hero who saved lives and was strung up by his thumbs, then died an early death.

10
BasedBetch 10 points ago +10 / -0

And if you have an attorney who is present and allows you to talk to them, FIRE that attorney and find one who isn’t a dumbass.

6
ISTApackagingguy 6 points ago +6 / -0

Agreed. The attorney is your legal representative and should speak for you only when absolutely necessary.

-16
OnlyTrump20 -16 points ago +3 / -19

When you talk to them, make it only trivial questions. You can have fun with that. Always respond with a question.

27
AdamBomb 27 points ago +27 / -0

Don't even do this. Remember, they can and will lie. Record your whole interaction with them on your phone and backup the data. Do not say ANYTHING other than "Please leave my property."

18
becray3point0 18 points ago +18 / -0

If you're not under arrest, have zero interaction. If you're under arrest, immediately say I want a lawyer and then repeat it if they even open their mouth again.

1
ChecksOut 1 point ago +1 / -0

Holy fuck. No. Do not do this.

18
NavyGuy 18 points ago +18 / -0

https://youtu.be/d-7o9xYp7eE

Stop whatever the fuck you are doing and watch this right now, take notes. When you are done watching it, replay it and watch the entire thing AGAIN! This time review your notes. The next day watch it again. Two weeks later.... again. Then... every month watch it AGAIN!

12
Joesf23 12 points ago +12 / -0

Watched this last week after someone posted it. This guy is smart and actually a good lawyer.

6
NavyGuy 6 points ago +6 / -0

This pede knows whats up 👆

11
beep_boop 11 points ago +11 / -0

Two things you can say: 1) am I under arrest? 2) I will not speak further without an attorney.

Period. Don't invite them in. Don't offer them coffee, don't give them directions to the local brothel, don't chat about Trump being the greatest-- NOTHING. Demand a lawyer before saying anything.

1
TwoStar 1 point ago +1 / -0

So then you get a lawyer, now what? Do you have to talk to them?

Why not just straight up refuse to talk to them, isn't that better?

2
ChecksOut 2 points ago +2 / -0

When you have a lawyer, the lawyer talks for you. That’s the point.

1
TwoStar 1 point ago +1 / -0

I understand that. But do you really have to talk with them even through your lawyer? I don't think you do, assuming you are not under arrest.

So I think it's, "Am I under arrest? No? Then you can leave now" and that's all.

If they say, "Yes, you are under arrest." The only response is, "I want my lawyer." When your lawyer arrives it should only be to say, "my client has nothing to say, charge him with a crime or release him immediately."

You don't have to say anything, not even through a lawyer. Ever.

Spez: If the lawyer tells you to cooperate with them and answer their questions just to make the issue go away, get a new lawyer. And don't even tell your lawyer any details about what did or didn't happen unless you actually get charged with a crime. Their job at first contact with the law is to protect your rights, not to defend you against charges, that comes later.

1
beep_boop 1 point ago +1 / -0

Basically this. Otherwise they'll try to General Flynn you

10
BitchesBCrazy 10 points ago +10 / -0

For real? I can't call them FEDERAL COMMIE FAGGOTS???

Well that sucks.

8
Cunny 8 points ago +8 / -0

THIS! Trust, they are showing up, too. Just expect it.

7
Stayinthefight 7 points ago +7 / -0

Pled the 5th

10
GlowboisGetFucked 10 points ago +10 / -0

No do not plead the 5th, there are reasons for this, say nothing you are dealing with an organization that will burn your life to the ground without a second thought; they use many tactics to manipulate you as well as the evidence available (ir: Gen. Flynn) The only response should be ...am I under arrest, if not end the communication or tell them to leave.

If you are in fact under arrest say nothing other than you want an attorney. The feds will continue to attempt subversion for hours on end sometimes, do not wavier and give in to the urge to speak...at all! (this part is important ) If you are in handcuffs or about to be , they WILL NOT let you go no matter what they say, or you say, you are going to jail so take a breath, sit back and chill cause nothing is in your control at that point other than you SHUTTING THE FUCK UP! And waiting for an attorney which most likely won't be for a while maybe a long while....on purpose ...just stay silent, and wait for the calvary. Stay Frosty Pedes

1
Darkheartisland 1 point ago +1 / -0

It is very hard for anyone to be silent under intense psychological pressure. They will aim to shock you, deprive you of sleep and food. They will try to act like your friend and be on your side, they are not. Would you rather be in hell for 72 hours or be locked up for 5 years for something trivial? It is your choice.

4
1GodisGr8 4 points ago +4 / -0

My comment exactly, at least while we still have a Constitution.

7
OnlyTrump20 7 points ago +7 / -0

Yeah, if they are chatty, then they aren't there to arrest you. So doubt everything about them. When they show an ID, tell them they could have printed that themselves. If they show a badge, tell them they could have bought that at a garage sale. Tell them you don't trust strangers. Or better yet, just don't answer the door at all. Get a phone number you can call to verify them.

8
kamalashugebutthole [S] 8 points ago +8 / -0

If you have one of those doorbell cameras (I don't allow commie tracking shit in or around my property), tell them through the microphone that they are welcome to leave a card in your door like the Chinese Restaurant does with their menus but you would like them to kindly get off your property.

3
LessAndLessIronic 3 points ago +3 / -0

Yeah, who's opening their door at all these days?

We're in a scary pandemic, right? Leave the package and get the hell of my porch. If there are people standing there I don't open the door. For anyone. Period.

3
becray3point0 3 points ago +3 / -0

I would call my local police. They're the good guys (in my town).

6
flyover_deplorable 6 points ago +6 / -0

I'd prefer to kindly tell them to get off my FUCKING property.

4
kamalashugebutthole [S] 4 points ago +4 / -0

That's ok too. But that's it. "Off my fucking property. Bye."

5
A_Flappy_Civic 5 points ago +7 / -2

Really? I thought we learned when cops and the DoJ started enforcing unconstitutional lockdowns. The only vote I regret this year is voting against defunding the police.

4
becray3point0 4 points ago +4 / -0

Depends on where you are. My county has true Christian Sheriffs and DAs. The police are great. The assholes are the ATF.

2
Mr-J 2 points ago +2 / -0

lol cops aint locking people down outside a city bud

5
EvilGuy 5 points ago +5 / -0

Also 4th reason. They are there to try and intimidate you and show they know who you are.

Honestly just don't even open the door. If they had a warrant they would bust it in anyways.

4
BasedBetch 4 points ago +4 / -0

Think of it this way: the feds are door to door salesmen trying to sell you a pair of handcuffs and astronomical legal fees, whether you did anything illegal or not.

4
becray3point0 4 points ago +4 / -0
  1. They have nothing on you and whether or not you incriminate yourself is irrelvevant, because they'll trick you into a process crime. Trick you into some kind of little lie and BAM...off to prison you go. SAY NOTHING. IMMEDIATELY ask for an attorney and record yourself doing it. +
4
DeepMind 4 points ago +4 / -0

"Don't call them Federal Commie Faggots." 🤣🤣

1
LessAndLessIronic 1 point ago +1 / -0

Wait, then how do we describe them?

4
deleted 4 points ago +4 / -0
1
kamalashugebutthole [S] 1 point ago +1 / -0

There is no reason to talk about being at the DC protests with the FBI or online. There is no reason to talk to the FBI period.

I am not suggesting that your should not share your political beliefs outside of a discussion with the cops.

3
winningagain 3 points ago +3 / -0
3
GreatHumungous 3 points ago +3 / -0

Right never tell cops or feds anything, just say you want your lawyer here right now. And have a decent lawyer, even the prepaid guys are ok but drop a name ‘I want my atty Jack Sanders here right now I have him on retainer’

3
magasf3n 3 points ago +3 / -0

FBI literally told me Miranda rights don’t apply cause I’m not under arrest. Please sticky this.

3
DiamondJoeQuimby 3 points ago +3 / -0

call your attorney immediately

3
DeplorablyCorrect 3 points ago +3 / -0

Good advice.

3
Darkheartisland 3 points ago +3 / -0

I was under investigation for a federal crime once. I got out of it by not giving any information. The feds just like easy cases and most people incriminate themselves and by the time they talk to a lawyer, it is way too late.

1
kamalashugebutthole [S] 1 point ago +1 / -0

That is true. Most of the lawyers that go into government work are either talented young lawyers who are using it to spring board to get real jobs and make money (but are not experienced trial lawyers who want to go to a jury with shitty facts) or are shitty lawyers who could not make a real career and therefore are not going to win with shitty facts.

Don't give them anything.

3
NadlerShartWaddle 3 points ago +3 / -0

Agent Smith, are you aware of the ligma statute?

2
Honk4Trump 2 points ago +2 / -0

This really should be a permanent sticky for the foreseeable future.

2
Fabius 2 points ago +2 / -0

This is so important. Should be stickied.

2
avocadotostado 2 points ago +2 / -0

Fuck these commie motherfuckers. "Lawyer" should be your mantra.

2
YoureFakeNews 2 points ago +2 / -0

Sage advice, Patriot.

2
mcpotsmoker 2 points ago +2 / -0

"Anything you do or say CAN and WILL be used AGAINST you in a court of law"

Nothing you say to police, FaggotBI, or any other type of law enforcement will EVER help get you out of trouble. They tell you this literally. Don't talk to them.

2
SaltiTaralli 2 points ago +2 / -0

Just remember the way that slime ball federal postal inspector treated the Project Veritas whistleblower. You'll never speak to anyone again without a lawyer present. A DAMNED GOOD LAWYER.

2
Reefy 2 points ago +2 / -0

That right there is very good advice. They are sneaky bastards. Do not trust them by any means.

1
Lowersidecustoms 1 point ago +1 / -0

Feds showing up for what? I haven't seen anyone mention if these are random instances or people accused of sketchy shit? In our current situation random incidents of the feds showing up to "ask questions" isn't at all unbelievable. These cocksuckers probably have already assembled a team to comb through every Trump supporters tweets and Facebook posts going back to the beginning

2
MAGADeluxe 2 points ago +2 / -0

I had feds show up after I went to DC

2
Lowersidecustoms 2 points ago +2 / -0

Ok yeah, I'm not surprised at all about that. I expect everyone that went will get a visit