We've a joke from back in the soviet union. I call the plumber to fix a leak, he says his first available vacancy is in ten years. I ask if it'll be in the morning or the evening. He says what do I care, it's ten years from now! I say the electrician will be there in the morning and I don't want a scheduling conflict.

Old soviet wisdom told men to always keep booze on hand. Magically, plumbers show up on time. Hopefully we've not fallen that far yet.