Blame the individual, the family, the relatives, the city, the race, the country ... - every single thing has their share. Although statistics do tell that race alone makes a gigantic difference, multiple times over. And this phenomenom can be seen from country to country, with almost identical ratios between races, so it's not just about the US and their "racism" or something like that

If she would have been beaten to death by her spouse who was also a mafia member, a gang-banger, a drug addict, a violent criminal, or some drunk, she would have been to blame in pretty much the same way: it was her own fault, her own bad judgement to be hanging around with those kind of people

If you want to be safe, select a safe spouse. Some dude with a PhD in mathematics might bore you to death, but probably not gonna beat you to death.