886
We wuz hobbits n shit (media.patriots.win)
posted ago by RATMW ago by RATMW +886 / -0
Comments (129)
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80
PotatoJoe 80 points ago +80 / -0

More shit no one will watch.

46
Palmertabs 46 points ago +46 / -0

They're spending A BILLION dollars on it. a fucking billion.

It's going to bomb.

25
Correndo 25 points ago +25 / -0

Holy shit you can't be fucking serious.

18
RedBlooded 18 points ago +18 / -0

I bet most of the money goes into their bullshit diverse cast.. it’s going to be shit. Amazon is already shitting on lots of things that will bomb. This is just another one.

7
covok48 7 points ago +7 / -0

Money laundering.

4
FromSethWithLove 4 points ago +4 / -0

Exactly this. They know it will bomb, but 10% for the big guy

31
Taqiyya_Mockingbird 31 points ago +31 / -0

I mean, the movies were already diverse and representational. What do they think the Orcs represent? Modern Europe could tell you...

8
Wankerton 8 points ago +8 / -0

Lol "strong female characters" how about good female characters.

11
NomadicKrow2 11 points ago +11 / -0

I mean... It already had strong female characters. It had realistic female characters in a fantasy world. Arwen was driven by her love for Aragorn, and disobeyed her father. What girl hasn't disobeyed her parents for a boy? I mean, it was relatable shit.

Nobody is going to relate to the bullshit they're doing. Writing stories, writing films, plays... It's all to put a mirror on stage and show the audience their own problems, their own wants and needs. I can't imagine how they're going to do that with demographics who barely give a shit about lord of the fucking rings.

6
deleted 6 points ago +6 / -0
6
M8kMdlErthGr8Again 6 points ago +6 / -0

Well I WAS,

MF.

63
JoeBidensDementia1 63 points ago +63 / -0

I never thought I'd die alongside an elf.

How 'bout fight wit a nigga?

14
ADAM_SCHITT 14 points ago +14 / -0

Kek

55
Danmax67 55 points ago +55 / -0

Honestly, that will be the least of the problems with this upcoming trainwreck. Prepare for them to piss on Tolkien's grave at every opportunity. There will be gratuitous sex, nudity and violence. Marvel style jokes shoehorned in. Ham-fisted overbearing political and social justice messaging. Misplaced and implausible love stories. Things that will make you wonder whether they were intentionally trying to make a shitty series.

31
BasedBoneSaw 31 points ago +31 / -0

Tolkien’s work is based on the collective legends/histories/stories of Northern European Germanic, Nordic, and Celtic peoples. It borrows from their legends, folk music, their heroes, their battles, their struggles, day to day economy, and their respective languages.

Coming out and shoving together some mish mashed plots that completely ignore that context will destroy the genre. Too bad I’m sure Amazon is completely clueless to this because it’s “racist” to celebrate any heritage from Northern Europe.

9
FetAnka 9 points ago +9 / -0

Their new Stockholm data center won't last long, that's for sure.

5
deleted 5 points ago +5 / -0
8
PaigeAshley 8 points ago +9 / -1

Exactly.

What makes me furious as well, is how when I talk to someone about a movie or show and I find out they've ONLY WATCHED THE REMAKE and all of them REFUSE TO EVEN TRY THE ORIGINAL.

When I ask them, "have you seen the original, it's 100% better and you'd love it," they tell me, "that's too old, it's cheesy & it has dumb, outdated special effects, and I like the actors of today better."

First of all, that's not true, the special effects are great, and second of all how can they judge it at all if they've never watched it?!

I'm not even talking about really old movies, even shows and movies from the 90's or even ten years ago, I know several people who refuse to watch anything less then five years old. It's infuriating.

3
NomadicKrow2 3 points ago +3 / -0

I prefer the updated True Grit, myself. Only because of the modern cinematography and how it played the story closer to the original serial. But I'd never refuse to watch the original because it's "old." Some people have no respect for origins.

3
QSWO1 3 points ago +3 / -0

Watership Down from 1978 would shut them up.

2
FromSethWithLove 2 points ago +2 / -0

I thought I was the only one who watched that. It haunted my dreams

2
QSWO1 2 points ago +2 / -0

It was on network tv when I was a kid. It is the most factual movie I have ever watched. Found a copy for my kids 10 years ago. The relevancy of the 1972 novel, and 1978 animated movie haunts my dreams too.

1
BidenTaintMyPrez 1 point ago +1 / -0

You can pick it up on DVD... it's a fantastic film. John Hurt is amazing.

6
Correndo 6 points ago +6 / -0

There will be gratuitous sex, nudity and violence. Marvel style jokes shoehorned in. Ham-fisted overbearing political and social justice messaging. Misplaced and implausible love stories.

You nailed everything wrong will most new movies and shows. Especially the Marvel jokes and implausible love stories. Fucking irritating.

4
sun_wolf 4 points ago +4 / -0

Critical Drinker did a good video in this with the same thoughts.

3
LiteraIIyHitIer 3 points ago +3 / -0

Goh away nao!

2
deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
23
AsaNisiMAGA 23 points ago +23 / -0

Why are nonhuman characters being shoehorned into human racial categories at all? This makes my brain hurt. =/

8
Correndo 8 points ago +9 / -1

It's like that black Vulcan in ST Voyager. It's like, why? Absolutely nothing wrong with black actors, of course, but it felt hamfisted.

6
AsaNisiMAGA 6 points ago +6 / -0

It was hamfisted.

4
shadypollster 4 points ago +7 / -3

You leave Tuvok alone. He was based AF.

4
A_Feral_Duck 4 points ago +5 / -1

Tuvok was fine and Tim Russ did a great job with the character despite the shit writing.

Chakotay on the other hand…..

1
Danmax67 1 point ago +1 / -0

Indeed. Tuvok was one of the better parts of that show, but that whole 'losing his mind' subplot just dragged things down.

2
CA-Refugee 2 points ago +2 / -0

Who's talking shit about Tuvok?

2
Correndo 2 points ago +2 / -0

Absolutely no one.

2
IHatePedophiles 2 points ago +3 / -1

Tuvok being black was incidental. The actor did a great job in the role. Black people can have acting jobs you know. It's when you FORCE it on everything that it gets woke and retarded.

0
Correndo 0 points ago +1 / -1

Black people can have acting jobs you know. It's when you FORCE it on everything that it gets woke and retarded.

That's exactly what I'm saying.

0
IHatePedophiles 0 points ago +1 / -1

How is hiring a black guy in a role where there is no mention of skin color or race "ham fisted"? It seems to me like they just hired an actor who happened to be black.

1
QSWO1 1 point ago +1 / -0

Immigration.

20
ThePatriotNitro 20 points ago +20 / -0

Cancel Netflix, Hulu, Disney, Amazon, etc. Get a library card. This is the way.

6
Createanaccount111 6 points ago +6 / -0

Physical media is the way to go, great quality, no buffering and watch when you want. Also you dont have to be inundated with woke bullshit and shitty woke remakes. Old cinema and foreign cinema is great too, even though most great films of their time tend to lean left, by today's standards most would be deemed "problematic"

6
mitzlplix 6 points ago +7 / -1

A liberry card? how do i get one? /s

3
FetAnka 3 points ago +3 / -0

"It doesn't matter that you where the librarian of the prison library for decades, you're still a criminal, and therefore won't get a library card" - Random conversation heard at the library.

3
muppeton 3 points ago +3 / -0

Forget the libraries. That's where they hold the Drag Queen story hours.

Just sail the high seas.

1
covok48 1 point ago +1 / -0

Just in time for Tranny story hour.

19
Bidens_Poopy_Diaper 19 points ago +19 / -0

LOL! "The Precious" will be re-imagined into the latest pair of Air Jordans.

8
DrCowboyPresident 8 points ago +8 / -0

Samwise steals Frodo's sleds at the last moment at Mount Doom and pushes him in

This might actually be entertaining

7
Bidens_Poopy_Diaper 7 points ago +7 / -0

Golum is re-imagined into a skinny jean wearing scrawny, balding soy boy, hanging out in the Starbucks back lot by the dumpsters, digging through scraps and trying to get soy...all the while wearing "The Preciouses".

3
NomadicKrow2 3 points ago +3 / -0

Oh, I promise the villains will be white. Trust me on that.

14
PaigeAshley 14 points ago +14 / -0

Do NOT watch or support this GARBAGE.

It's freaking DISGUSTING they are going to taint this masculine, christian based, beautiful book and movie series.

7
jennyfrutex 7 points ago +7 / -0

"strong female characters"

Eowyn would like to have a word with these people.

4
PaigeAshley 4 points ago +4 / -0

I love Eowyn! Her and her brother Eomer are two of my favorite characters. They don't often have great sibling relationships in movies and books, so this one was always special to me. :) And they are both so badass!

14
shadypollster 14 points ago +14 / -0

"Evil cannot not create, only corrupt and destroy."

2
PaigeAshley 2 points ago +2 / -0

This ^^^^^ 100%

11
wiseracer 11 points ago +11 / -0

After second brefast finna git us some rings!

11
Libertas_Vel_Mors 11 points ago +11 / -0

*rangs

8
p1smo 8 points ago +8 / -0

feature strong female characters

It already had strong female characters. Arwen took on a group of Nazgul by herself, Eowyn killed the Witch King, and Galadriel was one of the most powerful elves in Middle Earth.

3
PaigeAshley 3 points ago +3 / -0

This ^^^

1
covok48 1 point ago +1 / -0

Not those characters.

8
becky21k1 8 points ago +8 / -0

Everything woke turns to shit

2
Rockonanon 2 points ago +2 / -0

Everything, even your favorite work of fiction that you loved since you were a child, a sprawling epic that is easily one of the most spectacular achievements of human imagination. Woke will turn that to shit, too.

7
COLDWARPATRIOT55 7 points ago +8 / -1

Why? Tolkien didn’t write it with humans as characters, he wrote Hobbits...they’re frictional and they have no color assignment,

6
KingOfTards 6 points ago +7 / -1

They lose money on that shit. I wonder what tax incentive they get for creating stupid diversity shit?

6
coolhandcuke 6 points ago +6 / -0

They need to make some tall hobbits, too. It's so unfair that all hobbits are short.

6
PhantomShield72 6 points ago +6 / -0

LOTR is going the way of Star Wars.

5
Ex-libtard 5 points ago +5 / -0

Pass

5
gamephreak5 5 points ago +5 / -0

The Hobbit and LotR were envisioned by Tolkien to be a wholly British mythology about how our world began.

Every culture has their own "origin of the world" mythology story. Britain didn't have one. They had King Arthur as a mythical origin for Britain's monarchy, but not for the world that was uniquely British.

Tolkien decided to make one up for Britain. All the characters in the story are supposed to be "white" and "british".

To force inclusivity/diversity into the story ruins the author's vision and art.

5
repoman 5 points ago +5 / -0

Tolkien rolling in his grave.

5
FailSayf 5 points ago +5 / -0

This is pathetic. They think the OG's were too white but it isn't like there were rules for other directors and writers to make their own movies and stories. Are there "White's only" movie rules? No, People all over the world make movies. Everyone can audition for a part in the movie and everyone can also buy a ticket. This forced POC roles isn't genuine. It's fake and I'll not watch.

4
muppeton 4 points ago +4 / -0

Middle Earth was supposed to be an alternate version of prehistoric Britain. It's logical that the characters would be mostly white.

1
FailSayf 1 point ago +1 / -0

All these movies and shows forcing POC's into the mix just seems forced and superficial.

1
QSWO1 1 point ago +1 / -0

Frosty the Hoe man will be the go to childrens special for this Xmas that will not be.

5
_Sully_ 5 points ago +5 / -0

What the hell is Maori-types hobbits? Did the hobbits somehow escape the Shire and become seafaring?

5
Createanaccount111 5 points ago +5 / -0

Welp, there goes my interest in watching this series. I'll just stick to rewatching Peter Jacksons trilogy

4
ShadowyMrBlank 4 points ago +4 / -0

I smell a flop.

4
Those_Who_Wander 4 points ago +4 / -0

"Strong female characters" dafuq?! Galadriel was one of the oldest, wisest, most powerful beings in middle earth being half light elf and a ring bearer. Arwin was the queen to a numenorian king who helped win the war and ushered in a new age and Eowyn killed the fucking king wraith and led Rohan. How much more strength can you get?!

4
Cesare_Borgia 4 points ago +4 / -0

From what I remember there are basically no female characters at all in the books. That elf woman Galadriel or however it's spelled is the only one that comes to mind. And Tom bomadils wife but she's just as irrelevant to the story as Tom.

7
Philhelm 7 points ago +7 / -0

Eowyn and Arwen.

4
jtt888 4 points ago +4 / -0

This is what can happen to anyone's legacy once they give their rights to larger companies. JRR screwed up giving some of these rights to United Artists a long time ago.

3
deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
1
deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
0
progun_prochoice 0 points ago +2 / -2

the tv show isnt based on the books, well not really. it takes place during the 2nd age, thousands of years before the books. it is one of the least explored parts of middle-earth, so there really isnt anything saying how things should be (which is why i suspect they chose it). i am excited for this, and cannot wait.

4
FishStickIsles 4 points ago +4 / -0

Gandalf the Black, coming up.

3
EagleOverTriumph 3 points ago +3 / -0

Let me fix this.

"New - Amazon's upcoming "Lord of the Rings" TV show will be shit."

3
Fangerang 3 points ago +4 / -1

I truly hope they're this fuckin retarded. Just keep accelerating your own demise on the woke altar, I'll keep laughing about it.

3
deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
3
freebirdie 3 points ago +3 / -0

I am totally convinced that studios are creating this crap specifically to take a loss for tax purposes. They know going in that fucking no one wants to see it, yet still it gets made. In this case Amazon can say "we tried, folks be racist" then use it to ensure they still don't pay a penny in taxes.

3
Sylvester1212 3 points ago +4 / -1

Who reimburses them for all the money they lose on this nonsense?

2
covok48 2 points ago +2 / -0

Non one. It’s a vehicle for money laundering at this point.

3
d_bokk 3 points ago +3 / -0

The Hobbit pissed me off by having the dwarfs look too human, certainly wont be watching this abomination.

3
iSignedUpForThis 3 points ago +3 / -0

Kyle at The Babylon Bee needs to be put on suicide watch ASAP.

3
BroadSunlitUplands 3 points ago +3 / -0

even Maori-types

The way they phrased this is pretty fuckin racist if you ask me

3
Redpill-notCommieRed 3 points ago +3 / -0

So diverse for a race that shuns outsiders.

3
crobbies 3 points ago +3 / -0

can't have any european-based mythology, nope, no sireebob

3
RackOps 3 points ago +3 / -0

Lord of da Kangz!

2
Fuck_reddit34 2 points ago +3 / -1

Get your own culture, losers.

2
Crimalizeislam 2 points ago +2 / -0

This time "the Precious" is some morbidly obese welfare slob with 5 kids.

1
QSWO1 1 point ago +1 / -0

The movie Precious from 2009.

2
Hunter_loves_2_feet 2 points ago +3 / -1

Those movies were long as fuck! Do we really need a TV show?

2
deleted 2 points ago +4 / -2
2
Fourtyandfourtyfive 2 points ago +2 / -0

The Shire is gonna have a trashed, loud ghetto...

Radagast making blunts with the hobbit herb

Will it be Gandalf the Black? “Y’all mufuggers can’t be passin’ and shit!!”

The Nasgul will be blonde/blue eyed men.

Gollum isn’t looking for his Precious, he’s lookin at who pinched his bling.

Stryder will be a trans of color.

Fuck you Amazon. Waste your money!!

2
JZSquared 2 points ago +2 / -0

The globalists have deep pockets to fund this brainwashing propaganda. You're not the one paying for it, therefore you're not the customer and they don't have to satisfy you, only their globalist masters.

2
DoMe22 2 points ago +2 / -0

They may as well be saying outright that it isn't worth watching.

If it's not worth watching, it ain't even worth talking about.

2
LiberalTearsMiner 2 points ago +2 / -0

I won’t be watching that trash.

2
CommieCrats 2 points ago +2 / -0

So Original commies can't create shit, only steal.

2
SilentGuardian 2 points ago +2 / -0

I'm sure it'll be a huge hit./s Just like the rest of the crap that no one watches.

1
Meisenmouse 1 point ago +1 / -0

Another one bites the dust

1
SteersBeersandQueers 1 point ago +1 / -0

Inb4 poc gay and trans hobbits ROFL

1
ztrich007 1 point ago +1 / -0

Wow... just wow

1
1Pissedoffredhead 1 point ago +1 / -0

NOOOOOOOO!!!!