2873
It's not too late to brine your turkey.      YES            
posted ago by mynewspiritclothes ago by mynewspiritclothes +2875 / -2

Saltwater (should taste like the ocean), mace, allspice, nutmeg, peppercorns, cloves. You won't regret it. Hit me up if you want more pointers. Am chef.

More pointers: different parts of the turkey cook to different times. If you wanna knock it out of the park, carve it first. Then brine it. Then cook the parts separately. You can still use the carcass for stuffing.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Let Freedom ring!

I really am grateful for each and every one of you patriots. I'm thankful that I have a huge family who ALL are on the side of freedom... (which means they support Trump.)

And dont forget - if it just isn't quite there, just add some salt from some liberal tears.

Comments (376)
sorted by:
57
crumbhole 57 points ago +57 / -0

1/2 cup salt per gallon of water works for me. brine about 10 hrs. dry thoroughly before cooking. spatchcock, half or your better suggestion, piece out before cooking. good ole weber kettle makes a mean bird pedes.

22
CPTRVB 22 points ago +22 / -0

Weber Kettle 22” OG or go home. If I had a Unicorn wagyu brisket, I’d smoke it snake method on a kettle. Salt and pepper rub.

Fight me.

Happy Thanksgiving Pedes!

2
DrBJTester 2 points ago +2 / -0

It's expensive but it's worth it. Maybe not all the time but perfect for really special occasions. Salt and pepper confirmed 👍

1
JokerPede 1 point ago +1 / -0

Is the 32 inch Weber kettle acceptable if I have a big family?

EDIT: unsure of the size. I've had it for years. It's a lot larger than 22 inches though.

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deleted 8 points ago +8 / -0
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OnlyTrump20 6 points ago +6 / -0

Oh, thanks. That saves me from having to look that up as I do every year. You can also add sugar to it. I think it has to be pickling or kosher salt, or any salt that doesn't have iodine added which might cause a problem.

5
Forbidden_outcast 5 points ago +5 / -0

Kosher salt is just larger pieces, bc one tablespoon of table salt is not the same thing as one table of “kosher” salt. So look for kosher salt or “ice cream salt”

3
Quietam_Unum 3 points ago +3 / -0

Kosher and canning salts both are free of iodine.

4
Comedygene 4 points ago +4 / -0

Sea salt FTW. Haven't used table salt in ten years

6
SecedeNOW 6 points ago +6 / -0

Do you tie it back together before cooking?

13
DrBJTester 13 points ago +13 / -0

Nail gun.

8
Throwmeaway1235 8 points ago +8 / -0

.458 SOCOM at 25ft.

4
Comedygene 4 points ago +4 / -0

Shredded turkey

1
DrBJTester 1 point ago +1 / -0

.458 SO I'M at 12 meters

You are perfect in every way.

10
Mamapedia 10 points ago +10 / -0

Duct tape

2
deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
-9
Duchess -9 points ago +1 / -10

I dont know what I'm missing but this sounds like the worst turkey advice of my life. Carve it THEN cook the parts separately? Do you know how DRY breast will get if you cook carved portions? Its barely moist when you cook the whole bird.

8
CUNN1NG 8 points ago +8 / -0

He doesn't mean slice it up--just part out the turkey so it can cook evenly rather than the breast taking a beating before the thighs get done. My turkeys always come out the best turkey any of us have ever had just by over roasting anyway so I don't bother spatchcocking or quartering the bird. I like to show off my perfectly browned bird.

7
becky21k1 7 points ago +7 / -0

I like to show off my perfectly browned bird

Why does that sound like the punchline to a dirty joke

4
gaijin_ronin 4 points ago +4 / -0

Or what biden said to the pope

1
Patriot3per 1 point ago +1 / -0

Sounds to me like a European that's a fan of the slightly burnt cookie brand of lovely woman.

2
deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
2
Gabbs1212 2 points ago +2 / -0

i also slide pats of butter in with garlic! keeps moisture in

2
Mamapedia 2 points ago +2 / -0

Jacques Pepin recommends partially disjointing the bird by slitting into the 4 joints. He also removes the wishbone prior to roasting. I'm going to try it.

3
BannedbyRed 3 points ago +3 / -0

Brining forces water into the meat. It makes it very moist. I brined a bunch of chicken this evening and smoked them. It’s delicious .

1
justice_will_prevail 1 point ago +1 / -0

Spatchcocking is great, I'm just too lazy.

3
hunterforprison 3 points ago +3 / -0

Webber Smokey Mountain brings it home

33
AlmostHuman 33 points ago +34 / -1

Noice!

24
deleted 24 points ago +25 / -1
14
NADSAQ 14 points ago +15 / -1

Well that’s a ripoff

9
Billybobcuccio 9 points ago +9 / -0

She probably is having it prepared for her . It is possible to pay that much for a roast if it’s being prepared for you on thanksgiving day.

1
deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
6
NADSAQ 6 points ago +6 / -0

Should have bought a cheap turkey and 2 ounces of White Truffle from Alba

10
Agent_Orange 10 points ago +10 / -0

Should have bought a chicken and a bottle of Mad Dog 2020 and you'd never know the difference. knowwhatimsayin'?

3
Throwmeaway1235 3 points ago +3 / -0

Mickey’s 22 Hornet.

🤜🏻

5
Amateurgynecologist 5 points ago +5 / -0

Natty daddys and a mc chicken

3
grenades_and_ham 3 points ago +3 / -0

Damn straight cuz.

2
RabidZoo 2 points ago +2 / -0

Bro...we used to make Mad Dog Slurpees. One stop shopping at 7/11. Drink some Slurpee...add Mad Dog.

1
WolfMaddow 1 point ago +1 / -0

Anything is possible with Mad Dog 2020. You Rule! In AIT our platoon would chip in on a couple gallon bottles and it would lay waste to everyone. I woke up in my locker and our Co was under the bed. Good times.

1
justice_will_prevail 1 point ago +1 / -0

Biden Administration? Is that you?

30
TheHopiumReport2 30 points ago +30 / -0

We smoke our turkey with pecan and cherry, brine it one whole day before we smoke it. We baste it with butter, broth and a light beer.

14
mynewspiritclothes [S] 14 points ago +14 / -0

That sounds incredible! I wanted to smoke but I don't have the equipment.

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DrBJTester 10 points ago +10 / -0

The worthless communist Jeff Fucking Besos will sell you a stainless steel smoking tube for $20 turns any grill into a smoker with good wood chips. Takes a little practice, start with chicken or burgers and some videos. You'll be killing it like a free chopper ride Rikki Tic.

7
ItsFunToSay-M-A-G-A 7 points ago +7 / -0

You can smoke a turkey in a regular gas grill as long as your roaster pan and the bird will fit inside and you have enough clearance to close the top of the grill (obviously you want the turkey uncovered inside!). Just put the pan on one side of the grill and leave the burner turned off underneath it. On the other side of the grill, you can put your wood chips into small cast iron smoker boxes over the flame, or if you don't have those, you can make pouches out of foil to hold your chips.

Start out with the heat fairly high to get the smoke started, then when you see smoke start coming out, turn it back low so you don't burn your chips up too fast. You can add more foil pouches of chips when your smoke runs out. After you've smoked the turkey for a couple hours, you can put it in the oven to finish cooking through. Or you can start it in the oven for a couple hours and then put it on the grill to smoke until it is done. I've done it both ways before. Either way is going to make the turkey taste delicious! The gravy from the drippings and the stuffing will pick up incredible flavor too!

P.S. Cherry wood is awesome for smoking turkey, and so is mesquite! As suggested by u/TheHopiumReport2 above, pecan/cherry is a very good mix too!

2
Kamalas_a_Bitch 2 points ago +2 / -0

I’m doing hickory and maple couldn’t find pecan or cherry

2
ItsFunToSay-M-A-G-A 2 points ago +2 / -0

That sounds interesting, I've never tried that combo. Hope your turkey turns out great! Pecan is not quite as strong but similar to hickory. Another possible substitution for the cherry is apple wood. I haven't done a turkey with apple yet, but have done whole chickens with it and they were very good!

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Csh768 8 points ago +8 / -0

I have begun getting a 5 lb boneless turkey breast for our small family. Brine for about 5 hours. Sous vide at 150 with sage, Parsley and rosemary for a few hours and then ice bath and refrigerate. 2 hours before serving put into smoker with some turkey rub and smoke with pecan and a fruit wood for about 2 hours until it gets back to 150. Turns out great

5
BrianDamage 5 points ago +5 / -0

Cue the food safety "pros" who haven't read Baldwin's Tables

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Csh768 3 points ago +3 / -0

I like really freaking people out with medium rare plus pork chops

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bratt 4 points ago +4 / -0

My parents raised me on pork cooked to somewhere between pine and oak in hardness and toughness. You gotta kill the trichinosis ya know. Liver cooked until it was crumbly and bitter. Steak I won't describe it because I'll cry.

My Sous Vide pork butt then smoked to finish is still dripping with juice and flavor.

4
CrouchingKamalasHant 4 points ago +4 / -0

I just heard the ghost of my mother's voice say "Don't eat undercooked pork, you'll get tricka ricka!" ( code for trichinosis) Fortunately she was a good cook and didn't kill the meats.

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bratt 3 points ago +3 / -0

In reading about Ivermectin, I bet it would knock trichinosis right out.

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CrouchingKamalasHant 2 points ago +2 / -0

Bet you're right :)

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rebelde_sin_causa 2 points ago +2 / -0

My parents tried to scare me about trichinosis when I was a kid. Much later on I learned that the last documented case in the USA was in 1968.

2
CrouchingKamalasHant 2 points ago +2 / -0

Lol! That was before I was even born!

1
Gabbs1212 1 point ago +1 / -0

i had no idea! i was scared to eat pork at anything less than a 5 star steakhouse. now, mid level steakhouse chops, med-rare is great.

my mother drilled this into me young, and i was born in 80!

2
stingyarthropods 2 points ago +2 / -0

i cooked a 3 lb turkey breast eariler this week. sous vide at 145 for about 3 hours. could have taken it out earlier but i fell asleep .i have my own deli slicer so that's what i'll do with the breast. maybe make my own cranberry sauce again. i work around food for a living so its nice to be lazy with sous vide at home.

i actually had roast beef in the oven at the same time at 225 degrees. thought it would have been overcooked since i fell asleep but it was perfect edge to edge medium rare. sliced that up for sandwiches too.

5
BonnieBlueFlag 5 points ago +5 / -0

Sounds good. I'm injecting brine into mine and then deep frying it.

2
DrBJTester 2 points ago +2 / -0

That's a great method too.

2
BannedbyRed 2 points ago +2 / -0

Nice!

I’ve been using a lot of wild plum wood. Been wanting to try pecan. Heard it is an excellent smoking wood

1
AlmostHuman 1 point ago +1 / -0

Noice!!

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Verrerogo 16 points ago +16 / -0

Now that sounds nice.

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SaltyKrakenBalls 13 points ago +14 / -1

Have two soaking in the above and fresh apple cider. Happy Thanksgiving!

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 9 points ago +9 / -0

Mah man.

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America_No_1 8 points ago +8 / -0

I like a little jack in my apple cider

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 12 points ago +12 / -0

I like a little apple cider in my Jack.

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becky21k1 3 points ago +3 / -0

I like to tell people how the bar has a generic off brand soda so when they go to order they should ask for a Jack and Off.

12
OnlyTrump20 12 points ago +12 / -0

How many hours should you brine the turkey for? And the only way to cook a turkey for Thanksgiving is to not turn it into a Frankenstein project or a jigsaw puzzle. It has to be in one piece. I figured throwing it into the brine bucket sometime tomorrow will be enough time before Thursday morning. 12-24 hrs. But I think 12 hrs is enough. These are my two favorite turkey cooking videos...

https://youtu.be/AREWEOxVKD8

https://youtu.be/LF8Q8tN3rQ4

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 16 points ago +17 / -1

Twelve hours should be enough.

Don't know where you get the creed that "it has to be in one piece." Seems like a limitation to me... because different parts cook differently. 🤷🏼‍♂️

9
OnlyTrump20 9 points ago +9 / -0

It has to be one big bird on a platter for that Norman Rockwell moment if you are trying to impress family and guests. That's all. Doing parts is for the rest of the year. The foil breast cover is how to keep it from getting overdone.

3
NADSAQ 3 points ago +3 / -0

Depending on the size of the gathering if you get small turkeys you can do a show bird platter and cook the rest by piece.

3
OnlyTrump20 3 points ago +3 / -0

I got me a new roasting pan with a rack at the grocery store last night. Can't wait to use it instead of our old fashioned roasting pans which are more appropriate for a beef or pork roast. Turkeys don't need a deep or covered pan.

1
bigmikesballsack 1 point ago +1 / -0

It'll probably be the Chevy Chase moment for me...

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The88888888 3 points ago +3 / -0

12-24. Good post OP

12
SaltyKrakenBalls 12 points ago +13 / -1

I’ve soaked mine for 4 days. Falls apart into candied juicy meat heaven.

7
OnlyTrump20 7 points ago +7 / -0

OK. So I guess it won't hurt to start on it tonight. It doesn't take a huge bucket if you can get it into a tightly secured plastic bringing bag that won't leak into your fridge. Not that my fridge is clean and doesn't already need a deep cleaning, but that's for another day.

2
Herecomedatpresident 2 points ago +2 / -0

"Needs to be cleaned already" is a long way from "turkey juices and brine all over the place dripping into every crevasse" Pede don't second guess yourself.

2
Bleedsred 2 points ago +2 / -0

I brined my Turkey today using my stainless crab cooker pot with the handled stainless insert which makes it easy for pulling the Turkey out after 48 hours of brining. I have also deep Fried a Turkey in the past in the same Pot which was delicious but we prefer a roast.

1
PonySoldier66 1 point ago +1 / -0

propane air roast is the way here. sprayed liberally with a double IPA during cooking. Keeps the humidity up and the temps in line.

1
Red_Hibiscus 1 point ago +1 / -0

I always start mine on the Monday before Thanksgiving, hasn’t failed me yet!

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EricCharliemella 6 points ago +6 / -0

So I think it depends on the weight. I am brining right meow. I cheated this year and got a premade mix which suggests 1 hr brine per pound.

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Stanwyk74 8 points ago +8 / -0

😸

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Throwmeaway1235 4 points ago +4 / -0

What’s so funny, meow?

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Stanwyk74 3 points ago +3 / -0

Meow don't know what so meow funny meow.

1
JesusMaga 1 point ago +1 / -0

Here’s another great turkey cooking video I think you’ll enjoy

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2ywTcBSXAiQ

12
YaharaRiver 12 points ago +12 / -0

Whole Turkey in bucket of liberal tears just waiting for Thursday morning! It's a fine way to thaw a frozen turkey too, just about impossible to screw up a brine. Meat takes as much salt as it 'can' and no more. It's literally perfect every time. P.S. My turkey was $1.39 lb. 17 lb turkey was $24. I will broth the bones! (Wisconsin)

2
Langtath 2 points ago +2 / -0

98 cents a pound here in Miami. 15 pound Turkey. Small gathering so lots of leftovers.

2
Covfefeandcream 2 points ago +2 / -0

87 ¢ here in Houston at Wal-Mart. I don't understand the whole "turkey shortage" scare. There's plenty there

1
grenades_and_ham 1 point ago +1 / -0

Lion King had them on sale for $0.39/lb with a $35 purchase. Limit 2

2
becky21k1 2 points ago +2 / -0

I paid $1.09/lb last week. This week they had some fresh for $0.69/lb. Nice.

12
9401pc 12 points ago +12 / -0

Dry brine only.

I stopped wet brining years ago. Just dry brine with some kosher salt is much easier and turned up better results.

Also, most stores turkeys are already brined.

11
NADSAQ 11 points ago +11 / -0

Can’t believe I had to go this far down for that. Read the nutrition facts. If it’s 10% RDV of Sodium, it’s been brined already.

7
SneezerAugustus 7 points ago +7 / -0

Hijacking because it’s probably too late to comment directly on OP’s post. I’ll probably make this a post in a few minutes.

Wet brining results in spongy meat texture and rubbery skin unless you also plan to dry age for at least 24 hours after the brine. In that case you’re too late already.

Do not let your heart be troubled. Dry brining is far superior. Tomorrow evening, separate the skin from the meat with the handle of a wooden spoon and rub about 1 tsp of salt per pound under the skin and in the cavity. Place the bird on a cooling rack on top of a sheet pan or roasting pan and put in the fridge, uncovered, overnight. Take it out about 3 hours before cooking and let it sit at room temperature. If you are one of those troglodytes that eats Thanksgiving “dinner” at noon, you have an early morning awaiting you. I pity the fool who puts a 38 degree turkey in the oven.

Crank your oven up to 500 and let it preheat with the roasting pan inside. In the meantime, brush the skin with a little peanut oil. Butter is yummy but contains about 20% water which will reduce the crispness. When the oven is hot, transfer the bird (hopefully resting in a V-rack) to the pan and lower the oven temp to 300 after closing the door. Shoot for 150-155 in the deepest part of the breast and then rest it for 30-60 minutes. Don’t truss the limbs or the legs will take forever to cook. If the turkey came with a pop-up thermometer, rip it out before cooking and drop it in your liberal sister-in-law’s bloody mary.

Maybe I’ll make a gravy post tomorrow because that’s really the only reason to make turkey anyway.

1
bigmikesballsack 1 point ago +1 / -0

Saved, friend. Thanks.

1
deleted 1 point ago +2 / -1
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Induceddrag 11 points ago +11 / -0

Didn’t have any mace so I substituted a can of OC spray. Is that okay?……

3
PonySoldier66 3 points ago +3 / -0

man I'm glad I read this.

I got sprayed with OC for COPS training and didn't really hate it.

3
bratt 3 points ago +3 / -0

I sprayed my finger with bear spray and rubbed it in my eyes for Jan6 training. Later I took a piss. . .

2
PonySoldier66 2 points ago +2 / -0

.. and forgot to tell my wife!

2
mynewspiritclothes [S] 2 points ago +2 / -0

I mean, as long as no one has an aversion to spicy foods, right?

3
Induceddrag 3 points ago +3 / -0

Are pepper corns and pepper balls pretty much the same thing? Asking for a friend…..

3
becky21k1 3 points ago +3 / -0

yes, but it's gay to fondle the latter

2
Forbidden_outcast 2 points ago +2 / -0

Yes.

2
BonnieBlueFlag 2 points ago +2 / -0

Kek

10
Dckman 10 points ago +10 / -0

<3 Happy Thanksgiving

7
mynewspiritclothes [S] 7 points ago +7 / -0

You too!

6
BreakfastGun 6 points ago +6 / -0

Did you say... mace?

4
NADSAQ 4 points ago +4 / -0

not the rapper

1
AllYouHaveIsYourself 1 point ago +1 / -0

Lil Mace420

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gadsdensrevenge 6 points ago +6 / -0

We Brine every year and it is the tits.

7
Droford 7 points ago +7 / -0

I've brined a turkey since I saw Alton Brown do it back in 2000. A couple years ago he shared a brine-thaw method that saves time by using the brine to thaw a frozen turkey.

I'd recommend spatchcocking a really large turkey so it cooks evenly.

1
Herecomedatpresident 1 point ago +1 / -0

Brilliant.

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ThinkingAboutYou 6 points ago +6 / -0

if you don't have any allspice you can subtitute with oldspice..

2
becky21k1 2 points ago +2 / -0

Do I want the cologne or rub on the deodorant?

2
JoggingLooter 2 points ago +2 / -0

Can't make swedish meatballs without allspice.

1
fenceshitter 1 point ago +1 / -0

Mmmmm, taste like Dad smells, haha. My dad used that shit after every shave, every day. I'm pretty sure it's just T in a bottle.

6
deleted 6 points ago +6 / -0
5
MrSir 5 points ago +5 / -0

Also if you make a cheesecake from scratch right now it'll be ready in time for brunch.

5
Pederella 5 points ago +5 / -0

If you smoke your bird, save the bones after you pick them clean. Make a bone broth. Tons of info online to do it- easy peasy. You will have the most delicious broth for cooking or a soup. If you don't smoke, still use the bones to make broth. Learn not to waste and enjoy something delicious.

3
BonnieBlueFlag 3 points ago +3 / -0

Did you say... bone broth? https://youtu.be/3-ZqD9-W1_8

3
bratt 3 points ago +3 / -0

Turkey noodle soup. Slow simmer what is left on the carcass after getting the easy slices(Leave a good amount of meat) with celery, onions, carrots. Strain the broth. Pick out all the meat and set aside. Cook good egg noodles in the broth with dice potatoes, onions and celery. When they are done add back the diced meat. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!

5
WingedSquid 5 points ago +5 / -0

Can confirm. I’ve been brining my turkey for years and it always turns out great. Even just a simple salt water solution works wonders.

7
bratt 7 points ago +7 / -0

When will you ever cook it?

3
WingedSquid 3 points ago +3 / -0

You can’t rush things if you want it done right.

5
Nurrun 5 points ago +5 / -0

Carve before hand huh, that's a cool take. Recommend times per part? Usually the drum stick is my barometer: when I give it a tug and feels like it's going to fall off, I take the bird out.

3
mynewspiritclothes [S] 3 points ago +3 / -0

Nothing over an hour.

Breasts will take the longest. They need to be about 150, then take them out and they'll cook to 165 while they're sitting.

Same for other parts.

If you want crispy skin, crank that mofo up to like 500 for 15 minutes. Then back down to 375.

Don't baste. You're just losing heat... and you're gaining nothing.

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2karmalkorn2 2 points ago +2 / -0

No basting, nice.

2
Nurrun 2 points ago +2 / -0

This was the easiest Thanksgiving cook of my life, I bow to thee. I was thrown off how wet the breast was... not moist, nor juicy... soaking goddamn wet, I didn't know that was even possible!

Thanks again!

2
mynewspiritclothes [S] 2 points ago +2 / -0

Heck yeah! I love this!

1
ObamasLooseButthole 1 point ago +1 / -0

After all of this you're starting to sound like my mother. Is your name Mary and are you French?

1
mynewspiritclothes [S] 1 point ago +1 / -0

😟 Jimmy? Is that you?

4
AJoeDD 4 points ago +4 / -0

Were you the same pede who made the turkey brine thread last year?

5
mynewspiritclothes [S] 5 points ago +5 / -0

Yep :)

1
bigmikesballsack 1 point ago +1 / -0

Based Turkey Briner.

4
schiff_for_brains 4 points ago +4 / -0

Spatchcock the bird. By the time the breast is done (160) the dark meat should temp 170-180. 165 means carryover cooking to almost 175 while resting and that why the breast meat is so dry.

1
Tpgsr 1 point ago +1 / -0

This is an excellent tip. I Spatchcock birds when grilling and roasting, it works. When you do it, it is best to cook on a sheet pan with a wire rack.

1
schiff_for_brains 1 point ago +1 / -0

Or your grill. The Weber kettle is near perfect to cook turkeys. Though most other grills with indirect heat will work just fine. Just keep the heat up (325ish)

4
Hanging_Chad 4 points ago +4 / -0

Where can I buy some seawater?

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JoggingLooter 9 points ago +9 / -0

You could ask Nancy Pelosi. Here is her address for her beachfront property. 429 S Beach Rd, Hobe Sound, FL 33455

2
Stanwyk74 2 points ago +2 / -0

Fuck her

1
CrouchingKamalasHant 1 point ago +1 / -0

swamp water

1
bratt 1 point ago +1 / -0

Does anyone know how to attract alligators to one spot?

Edit: or sharks?

2
horsefacestorm 2 points ago +2 / -0

You are gonna need a lot of turkeys. Or preferably, commies.

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Hanging_Chad 1 point ago +1 / -0

Got Obama's Hawai'ian beachfront address? That seawater may be saltier

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NADSAQ 2 points ago +2 / -0

You have to charter a yacht first to get the free-range stuff

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winningagain 4 points ago +4 / -0

Can confirm. Best turkey I've ever tasted. I'll never go back!

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IncredibleMrE1 4 points ago +4 / -0

Happy Thanksgiving to you too, fren!

4
__I_dindu__nufin_ 4 points ago +4 / -0

I really am grateful for each and every one of you patriots. I'm thankful that I have a huge family who ALL are on the side of freedom... (which means they support Trump.)

I am going to have a lonely Thanksgiving due to being the only one in my family that opposes this covid tyranny insanity and isn't a hopelessly woke Dem-voting cultist, including wife. She won't even hug me or give me affection anymore. I don't know what she even has planned for Thanksgiving day. I was going to work Thurs and Fri instead but they decided to shut the whole plant down so people could be with their families. I just wanted to shut my brain off and work.

I am thankful that my newborn son is healthy and adorable despite mom getting the vax without even asking me while early in the pregnancy. I am thankful that I am physically fit and still have skills that I can use to earn a living to take care of my son. I am thankful that Kyle Rittenhouse will have Thanksgiving with his family, who must have missed him like crazy. I am thankful that when I thought I had nobody left on my team, there was still a light on inside me that I rediscovered, and it reminds me I am connected to my creator always and that I don't need to feel hopeless or alone. I am thankful that my family are all healthy and aren't wanting for anything. I am thankful that I have experienced a life of liberty from birth in the USA with all the ups and downs that come with freedom. I am thankful that I had my freedom briefly taken from me by the state as a teenager, so that I learned how sweet true freedom is and now I am somebody who will NOT give that up, ever. I am thankful for the awareness and toughness I earned from it, as new threats emerge to imprison me again for merely wanting to be left alone and declining an injection. I am thankful for everyone and everything that broke me and ground me to dust so that I could forge myself back as the person I want to be, with my own principles and direction, unimpressed by people who try to manipulate me with threats or bullying or ultimatums or gaslighting. I am thankful for the clarity that my creator has provided me, to know that choosing to use my voice to speak what is truly in my heart regardless of how I may be attacked or ridiculed, is ultimate freedom, and the foundation of all other subsequent liberties. I am thankful that my creator does want me to exist and to have a voice, even when it seems like so many others don't.

5
mynewspiritclothes [S] 5 points ago +5 / -0

So much I want to say but I want to keep it simple, even at the risk of sounding trite or cliché.

I can be your reprieve on Thanksgiving Day. Message me. We can talk more about... everything you just brought up.

You DO have backing. We're out here.

You said some really good things in your post. Like... you get it. So let's talk.

I have a way 🤷🏼‍♂️ try it out

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__I_dindu__nufin_ 5 points ago +5 / -0

Thanks pede, I'll keep it in mind. I appreciate the kind words very much.

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 5 points ago +5 / -0

Of course. God bless.

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stayawyliberalscum 3 points ago +3 / -0

Both of y'all give me hope.

God Bless & Happy Thanksgiving!

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KilroyJCNJ 1 point ago +1 / -0

🙏👍

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Tpgsr 4 points ago +4 / -0

I have a very specific sous vide and fryer method that cranks out some of the best turkey you could ever imagine. I have never taken the time to write it all down or film it though.

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Armatron 2 points ago +2 / -0

Sous Vide all the way! I use mine all the time for poultry. It's the easiest way to cook perfect turkey hands down. I sous vide the cut up parts then brown the skin in the broiler. 100 perfect every time.

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 2 points ago +2 / -0

You have a sous vide setup? Id recommend that all day.

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Tpgsr 2 points ago +2 / -0

I have 3 of them. We entertain a ton and it is such an easy way to have foods at the 90% point for service.

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Mamapedia 1 point ago +1 / -0

I was just looking into doing my Christmas beef tenderloins sous vide. Have you? If so, sear before and after, or just after?

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Tpgsr 2 points ago +2 / -0

Just after. I use a large stainless pan outside on a butane burner. Works perfect.

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Mamapedia 1 point ago +1 / -0

Thanks!

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PonySoldier66 1 point ago +1 / -0

Ultrasonic sous vide is the tits.

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rossiFan 4 points ago +4 / -0

Based chef is based. I'm thankful for you.

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 4 points ago +4 / -0

See now... I could brine with my own tears.

Seriously - I'm serious - it's so good to know you people are out there.

God bless. Happy Thanksgiving.

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RedBonaparte 3 points ago +3 / -0

Gordon is that you???

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SouthernParadise 3 points ago +3 / -0

Sea salt, orange slices, Belgian white ale, fresh Rosemary sprigs, elephant garlic. Pat bird dry. Stick elephant garlic under skin. Brush with olive oil. Season with fresh Rosemary, thyme, and sage, salt and pepper. Tie legs. Put in preheated cast iron Dutch oven. 375- 10min per pound or until thickest part reaches 160. Let stand in Dutch oven for 15 min. Never had a dry bird in 30 years.

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 3 points ago +3 / -0

Yes! Sounds great.

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holliday50 3 points ago +3 / -0

I brine with saltwater, peppercorns, lemon peel, herbs (usually thyme, rosemary & Sage). I then spatchcock the bird, inject it, rub it and put it on the smoker. Put a saucepan on the fire box with a couple of sticks of butter, garlic & same herbs and baste it every hour or so.

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EricCharliemella 3 points ago +3 / -0

You've got to brine! What a difference!

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War_Hamster 3 points ago +3 / -0

Nice post.

I'm a guest at an orphan Thanksgiving, so I won't be doing any cooking, but you did just get my mouth watering.

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coverband 3 points ago +3 / -0

OP is right on about splitting the bird. Properly done, it's quicker to cook, moist and easier to serve.

This is the first year we aren't cooking a turkey for friends and family. Everybody has gone out of town or is doing their own thing.

Going to do a prime rib roast for just us. Plus we'll have some tamales coming in today.

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KilroyJCNJ 1 point ago +1 / -0

Prime Rib is our traditional New Year’s Day dinner.

This will be the first year we won’t be doing a 7-bone roast. . .

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HeavyMetalPatriot 3 points ago +3 / -0

What's your best suggestion for cooking sweet potatoes?

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 9 points ago +9 / -0

I like to keep it simple. Roast them HARD. Should depress when you touch them. Peel the skin - ... or don't. Dice it. Fit it into a dish. Then (I might take a lot of flak for this) crumble some cinnamon toast crunch on top. Bake hot for a few minutes. Finish with butter.

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OnlyTrump20 4 points ago +4 / -0

For any regular day, I just bake them until done which is when they start leaking their sweet juice. For Thanksgiving, I cut them into pieces and boil them. Then place the pieces in a tray with a sauce made from brown sugar and butter, covered with mini marshmallows. (Gotta please the kids and childish adults, after all.) And bake them until it looks good.

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bratt 1 point ago +1 / -0

I am weird . I hate mushmellows and somores.

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Stanwyk74 1 point ago +1 / -0

I agree. Dice up and roast then I put brown sugar and butter the last 20 minutes or so

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CrouchingKamalasHant 1 point ago +1 / -0

Sounds delicious

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MyAuntFanny 1 point ago +1 / -0

I am soooo trying this!

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SouthernParadise 2 points ago +2 / -0

I peel and cube them, boil till very soft. Drain and add butter, brown sugar, orange peel, cinnamon, nutmeg and clove. Mash really good. Put into individual ramikins and top with a pat of butter and some mini marshmallows. Bake at 375 until marshmallows are browned slightly and make a crust. If you don’t want to bake, you can use a mini torch. Enjoy :)

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ConstitutionNailedIt 3 points ago +3 / -0

Im a tad simpler. 14 lb turkey, in a Gatorade cooler, 5 pints of water, 5 pints of ice (because a pints is a pound the world around.) for 24 hrs. Add kosjer salt, and brown sugar. Brine that shit for 24 hrs. Take it out, DRY IT OFF (LIKE, NO WATER DRIED OFF.) Peanut oil to 400°. Slowly (like, REALLY SLOWLY,) drop the turkey in. 3.33 minutes per pound. The oil will check back to 375° as the turkey goes in. Do it somewhere where your house won't burn down in case shit goes sideways. Enjoy the best turkey ever with no gravy. (BTW - the skin deep-fried is amazing.) 45 min later, the best turkey you've very had. And, no gravy required. Juicy AF. HAPPY THANKSGIVING, FRENS... I LOVE YOU ALL. And, btw, don't take no liberal bullshit at the table. Hit 'em with facts... we're on the right side of history.

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KilroyJCNJ 2 points ago +2 / -0

I love doing deep-fried Turkey——- my preferred method. But roasted is by request this year, because we haven’t had it in so long!

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 2 points ago +2 / -0

Roast them first. Make sure they have browned a little, then you're going to sauté in oil, little bit of minced garlic - and at this point you just want the carrots up to heat because they're already cooked - then add some honey, make sure it glazes, then mount it with butter (plenty of butter).

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Buff_cousin_Elroy 3 points ago +3 / -0

Mace? Like you squirt fuckin’ pepperspray on it?

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StillWhitepilled 2 points ago +2 / -0

I thought the same thing. Had to look up the other definition: "the reddish fleshy outer covering of the nutmeg, dried as a spice."

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 1 point ago +1 / -0

Dude... totally.

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NoComment 3 points ago +3 / -0

This is the advice we all crave

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TheInteriorDesigner 3 points ago +3 / -0

I remember you telling us to do this last year and it made all the difference.

Mine is in the cooler now, has been since 3pm yesterday. Gobble gobble.

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 3 points ago +3 / -0

Now this... this puts a smile on my face. Happy Thanksgiving!

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TheInteriorDesigner 2 points ago +2 / -0

Follow up : my husband just told me he thinks this year was the best turkey I have ever cooked. Partly because I got a fresh bird at our local farm, but the brine most def made it the most moist bird ever. So good!

I'm making a turkey pot pie right now with my leftovers, carcass making some stock.

thanks, Fren

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 1 point ago +1 / -0

That's so good to hear!

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ethan123 3 points ago +3 / -0

How do I do turkey legs? I don't want to do an entire turkey just cooking for myself...

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 3 points ago +3 / -0

Brine them in salt water. If you have a smoker, smoke them for about an hour. Then cook on high heat. Or even fry them

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OnlyTrump20 3 points ago +3 / -0

The leftovers will keep in your freezer and you should get some cats to help eat it up. There is never too much turkey around here with my hungry kits. One year I found some forgotten turkey in the freezer and it was just as juicy and delicious as ever, so don't be afraid to store it.

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Carcosa 3 points ago +3 / -0

You in New York ? Got a seat at my table for you

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ethan123 1 point ago +1 / -0

No not NY, and no, I'm not going anywhere for Thanksgiving (stranger danger...). But thank you for your offer.

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becky21k1 2 points ago +2 / -0

Ask it nice to spread them first

Seriously though you might get a small breast or some thighs, the leg has those stupid fiber things in them and if you don't cook it to falling apart it's a pain in the ass to try to eat around or carve around.

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NADSAQ 2 points ago +2 / -0

I hate to recommend Whole Foods for anything but they sell turkey by the part. Fuckers charged me 2.50/lb for turkey backs, though.

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JimmyJam 3 points ago +3 / -0

This pro tip did me nicely last year

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 1 point ago +1 / -0

COOL! Makes me smile.

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OhioProud 3 points ago +3 / -0

Great post! Happy Thanksgiving!

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Mangar 2 points ago +2 / -0

I used to always brine my Turkey. However, this year I'm going to salt them instead. (I guess a dry brine) I'm curious how it comes out. I got one Heritage Bird I'm going to roast, and a supermarket bird for the smoker.

Either way: Brines are essential. It's such an easy thing, yet makes such a huge impact on the overall flavour.

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justice_will_prevail 2 points ago +2 / -0

We're brining a citrus, sweet tea brine with ginger, garlic and rosemary. I brine about an hour per pound.

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MrGreggle 2 points ago +2 / -0

Dry brined and spatchcocked is the way to go.

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JBJones 2 points ago +2 / -0

Deep fry that baby! We also deep fry whole fryer chickens to snack on while we get the meal moving.

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RobezTobez 2 points ago +2 / -0

Hello fellow chef 👋

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ThisBlowsChunks 2 points ago +2 / -0

I used to maple brine every year, but now I just "vaccinate" that bird with some Cajun Injection, drop him in the "Big Easy" air fryer that's hooked up to my propane bottle out back, go do something else for about 3 1/2 hours and Bob's Your Uncle. Even more tender and juicy that all that brining I did and way less work.

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mynewspiritclothes [S] 3 points ago +3 / -0

That's what she said.

....

Okay if you only have breasts, pound them out (that's what she said)

Brine them or marinate them. You want salt and acidity.

Then if you have a grill, you know what to do.

Or, get a Sautee pan really freaking hot, with oil of course, but it should be smoking. Oven should already be preheated to about 400. Sear it on the stove, skin side down, flip it over, then throw it in the oven until it's done (in the same pan.)

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Lieutenant_Worf 3 points ago +3 / -0

I cooked 1000 pounds of skin on turkey breasts last Tuesday, not exaggerating. AMA.

Ours came brined in the package. We hit them with a rub and roasted them at 425 for 30 minutes, then down to 325 for the rest of the cook. I think they took about 2 hours total in a fully loaded combi oven.

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Lieutenant_Worf 4 points ago +4 / -0

4oz brown sugar. 1 tablespoon each of salt, pepper, chili powder, garlic powder, onion powder. Pinch of cayenne.

I recommend this only for doing a breast, not a whole bird because it will flavor the drippings used for making gravy.

Also a good rub for pork.

I like this rub, but if you'd rather go the poultry seasoning route, use fresh rosemary, sage, and thyme. Chop it and mix it with softened butter. Rub that under the skin.

If you just want to use straight dried poultry seasoning, mix in some salt.

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TPMJB 2 points ago +2 / -0

This year I'm not cooking lol. Next year though, I'm deep-frying a turkey. I'll take this advice...with a grain of salt.

Ba dum tsss

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KilroyJCNJ 1 point ago +1 / -0

Deep-fried Turkey is AWESOME.

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Seatacjoe 2 points ago +2 / -0

Happy thanksgiving to you sir!