1753
Comments (49)
sorted by:
69
Apersonofinterest 69 points ago +70 / -1

Elongate.

I bet he said that to that flight attendant that he showed his Willy too.

35
DonttrustChina 35 points ago +35 / -0

Pfffft, he didn't show anybody his willy. At least not anybody who didn't wanna see it. C'mon, a #MeToo surfaces less than 24 hours after he announces he's a Republican? No fucking way that's legit.

5
sordfysh 5 points ago +5 / -0

Yeah. It seems retarded that a guy like him, having no prior history of sexual malfeasance, and being as young and smart as he is, would do something like that.

I'm guessing the flight attendant is going to not be able to recall the month it allegedly happened.

This will be a fun defamation lawsuit against her and the papers who report. Elon Musk is looking to acquire some media outlets.

5
DonttrustChina 5 points ago +5 / -0

We joke about it. When people sue the press over shit like this.

But Elon...might literally be able to do that.

28
shadypollster 28 points ago +28 / -0

Kek

23
WhiteBoySummer 23 points ago +23 / -0

He’s a fucking time traveler, just like Barron. Holy shit, this timeline

11
hardcorCDN 11 points ago +11 / -0

“elongate” To make (something) longer, especially unusually so in relation to its width. 😎

2
Gr4ck3L 2 points ago +2 / -0

Next Musk business venture lel

3
ModernKnight 3 points ago +3 / -0

You've heard of the Swedish Penis Enlarger, now try the South African Elongater!

7
lordvon 7 points ago +8 / -1

no he said it in his mind and it happened.

3
RecreationalNyquil 3 points ago +3 / -0

The flight attendant agreed to give him a massage. And she was shocked when Elon was naked with a blanket over his lower body. Thats the standard for all massages I've ever gotten.

46
MrM1A2 46 points ago +47 / -1

Im already calling his followers "Muskets"

32
Gesirisi 32 points ago +32 / -0

Muskets and Trumpets?

20
Brandon 20 points ago +20 / -0

Ye olde blunderbuss.

11
bidensmissingbrain 11 points ago +11 / -0

Still better than Tweep.

2
MaoHadOnly1Testicle 2 points ago +2 / -0

Tally ho

30
independentbystander 30 points ago +30 / -0

Elongate

LOL

10
deleted 10 points ago +10 / -0
26
MythArcana 26 points ago +26 / -0

Impressive length.

9
obamagavemeaphone 9 points ago +9 / -0

A nimble navigator

5
Foomer 5 points ago +5 / -0

I miss when Trump had two curved hollow fangs.

26
PatrickHangry 26 points ago +26 / -0

The most shocking thing about Elongate wasn't its length or even how long it lasted, but the way it penetrated every aspect of society with its staggering girth.

19
Mungo 19 points ago +19 / -0

Seriously??? This guy just keeps getting better!!!!

16
shadypollster 16 points ago +16 / -0

🤣🤣🤣

11
buck-breaker 11 points ago +11 / -0

You know MSM is trying to cook up something as we speak, and it will be nonstop attacks against him for the foreseeable future. It's pathetic how predictable the west's enemies are and it's sad (and scary) how many people still don't get "it."

11
LongKahn 11 points ago +11 / -0

The attacks against Trump is what redpilled me. This could be an opportunity for many to see how the system works

1
deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
5
Schrodingers_Cat 5 points ago +5 / -0

Hallucinate, desegregate, mediate, alleviate

Try not to hate, love your mate

Don't suffocate on your own hate

Designate your love as fate

A one world state faked Elongate

1
WenOli311 1 point ago +1 / -0

INXS song?

5
Controlgroup 5 points ago +5 / -0

Haha

3
signature226 3 points ago +3 / -0

This is the best thing since reusable rockets.

2
SageHallmar 2 points ago +2 / -0

Meme Lord Elon, keep shitposting till they surrender, then bury them in shitposts

2
BelfordBob 2 points ago +2 / -0

It’s not the size of the comeback, it’s the impact!😂😂😂

2
tonkabodhi 2 points ago +2 / -0

🥸

1
erefernow 1 point ago +1 / -0

Darn. I can't do cool stuff with MY name.

1
barwhack 1 point ago +1 / -0

He named his own enormous lengthening "scandal"...

1
goodguy 1 point ago +1 / -0

Reddit wants you gone.

1
pepe_lover 1 point ago +1 / -0

Assistant to the Shit poster General in Chief.

1
Waitafriggingminute 1 point ago +1 / -0

The scandal should be called that ONLY if it's a sex scandal.. OH, WAIT!?!?

1
3dandy 1 point ago +1 / -0

This is definitely a insur-erection.

1
2016TrumpMAGA 1 point ago +1 / -0

Pure. Gold.

1
YOLOSwag_McFartnut 1 point ago +1 / -0

I wonder how long he's been dying to say that

1
ghost_of_aswartz 1 point ago +1 / -0

I am starting to fall in love with this man

1
Just_dumping_fuel 1 point ago +1 / -0

once this is just over it will be a noun. we shall refer to this scandal hoax as "Elon got Elongated"

well executed joke that the punch line will happen in about a year or two

1
CynicalTwit22 1 point ago +1 / -0

Incite an erection then

1
BrewSwillis 1 point ago +1 / -0

Yeah, and I took shit in another post for correctly stating that Elon was an attention whore. 🙄

1
Illuminaughtie 1 point ago +1 / -0

despite being a wef young global leader , i am mostly enjoying this fucker ngl

1
BostonVoter 1 point ago +1 / -0

e·lon·gate /ēˈlôNGˌɡāt/ Learn to pronounce verb make (something) longer, especially unusually so in relation to its width. "an artist known for elongating the human figures in his paintings"