Yeah, there's too many people who are too "into" themselves.

About halfway through the whole thing I are more religious and that was also helpful in phasing it down. Some people make it their religion. "I must be trans and that will make everything okay." That's different form: "This is forbidden by the Laws, and my punishment may be great or small, and it may be in the next world or in this one." And kinda realizing there's a lot of little (and not so little) punishments that do result in this one. I'm still paying for them in one way or another.

(Mostly because that since it was my main erotic trigger, I have trouble getting aroused without it, even today. That's a punishment.)