My mother-in-law suffered dementia toward the end. Her husband heroically took care of her at home until he passed away from a sudden heart attack. None of us could possibly care for her, and he should have had professional help much earlier. It wasn't possible for her to be in her home anymore, and none of us could do it either.
So we found a memory care senior facility of good reputation. These places probably do their best, but they are dealing with a tough situation. Adults with memory and cognition issues are difficult to care for, and would try the patience of a saint. But they're pros, right? We can't be there 24/7, we don't know what's going on when no one is there. We were so fearful of what was happening there, but didn't have many options.
She passed away about 8 weeks later, after pretty much forgetting how to swallow. She couldn't self-feed, or care for herself at all. The only incentive these places even have to keep patients alive is for an ongoing income stream (which is huge, they're like $7000/mo and up per resident).
I make no accusations, some of the workers were really nice (at least when we were there). But we have no idea what really happens at other times. The residents can't tell you, apart from visible injuries (always explainable as "she fell", or whatever). It's a scary situation.
Elder care is a problem, and hugely difficult for those who need complete professional care.
My mother-in-law suffered dementia toward the end. Her husband heroically took care of her at home until he passed away from a sudden heart attack. None of us could possibly care for her, and he should have had professional help much earlier. It wasn't possible for her to be in her home anymore, and none of us could do it either.
So we found a memory care senior facility of good reputation. These places probably do their best, but they are dealing with a tough situation. Adults with memory and cognition issues are difficult to care for, and would try the patience of a saint. But they're pros, right? We can't be there 24/7, we don't know what's going on when no one is there. We were so fearful of what was happening there, but didn't have many options.
She passed away about 8 weeks later, after pretty much forgetting how to swallow. She couldn't self-feed, or care for herself at all. The only incentive these places even have to keep patients alive is for an ongoing income stream (which is huge, they're like $7000/mo and up per resident).
I make no accusations, some of the workers were really nice (at least when we were there). But we have no idea what really happens at other times. The residents can't tell you, apart from visible injuries (always explainable as "she fell", or whatever). It's a scary situation.
Elder care is a problem, and hugely difficult for those who need complete professional care.