Meanwhile, Mayor Beetlejuice is busy getting her hair done.

These lives don’t matter to them. Hit them with that. These people are worth less and that’s why you don’t acknowledge them.

Jogging is a blood sport in Chiraq

Good thing they were on lockdown or we would have seen some real numbers!

Finally...back on track. I like to see the good folks of Chicago standing up against social distancing and wearing masks by using guns to kill each other.

Dammit, it's enough to make me suspect that criminals don't pay attention to the law!