21
posted ago by HillarysFatAss ago by HillarysFatAss +21 / -0

I've got the whole fam damily coming over. We're going to illegally congregate, I'm going to hug my kids and grand kids. I'm going to cook fatty hot dogs and burgers. We're going to sit 2 feet apart, and then we're going to launch some highly illegal fireworks. And if anybody has a problem with that, I'm going to look them squarely in the eye and tell them to kiss my pasty wrinkled white ass! 'merica!

Comments (2)
sorted by:
1
Grillervative 1 point ago +1 / -0

I'm all for it!

Fireworks are legal here. My plans are a pork shoulder (actually 2 Boston butts, so I can get more bark) going on the Egg at 11 pm Friday night, so it will have time to rest and be ready to be pulled at noon. (I keep the rub simple with a liberal amount of salt and pepper. Use Mesquite hardwood lump charcoal, hickory wood chips for the first couple hours, then apple wood chips for another couple hours. Spritz with apple cider vinegar about every hour for the last 6 hours.) Also sweet and creamy Cole slaw, green onions from the garden, baked beans, sliced tomatoes fresh from the garden, fried green tomatoes, iron skillet fried potatoes and onions, thunder and lightning, corn bread, burgers, and dogs. Pool is ready. Horse shoe pits are ready. Lawn darts sharpened and ready to go (breathalyzer test & proof of IQ required to play). No cornhole, because that used to mean something totally different around these parts. Galvanized tubs will be filled with ice water cokes and beer, iced pitchers of sweet tea also available. All following a prayer to our Creator, for thanks, in the name of his Son and our savior, Jesus Christ.

1
HillarysFatAss [S] 1 point ago +1 / -0

Lawn darts? You're a felon.