These are turnout suppression polls, designed to discourage us from turning out, and you sound like you are discouraged, soldier.

When you and the rest of us do, in fact, turn out, you will have the same stunned, despairing, tear-filled, apocalyptic election coverage that we have all come to love, as we give our answer to these polls, which were also deployed in vain against us in 2016.

They're telling us that Texas is a toss-up! Think! Senator Beto O'Rourke!