I got out of the Navy in 2008.
I started dealing with my friends killing themselves off before I got my honorable.
I had more than enough after I was discharged.
After losing friends while active, and after they got out to suicide I swore I would keep living to honor them and live the lives they couldn't.
It is getting more difficult everyday. I'm feeling PHYSICAL PAIN from the fact that I can see data and patterns while the entire world is just giving into feelings and forgetting what happened 5 minutes ago.
I'm in the works of getting my VA disability increased because of this and extra therapy sessions, but all I get is platitudes and "just go along with it, you need your job" kind of shit.
I am SOOOOOOOO fed up with it. SOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUCKING FED UP WITH IT.
If I were not a man of my word, I would not be here right now. I am a man of my word and I will be here until the bitter end.
Thank you.
My family has a history of serving, it's bred into me.
It's cliche to say people were born too late but my Pap was korean war veteran and I grew up around him and his friends (all Korea/Vietnam vets) and I really think that was the end up men being men.
Hard times create strong men, strong men create good times, good times create weak men, and weak men create hard times.----> We're in the hard times.