I got out of the Navy in 2008.
I started dealing with my friends killing themselves off before I got my honorable.
I had more than enough after I was discharged.
After losing friends while active, and after they got out to suicide I swore I would keep living to honor them and live the lives they couldn't.
It is getting more difficult everyday. I'm feeling PHYSICAL PAIN from the fact that I can see data and patterns while the entire world is just giving into feelings and forgetting what happened 5 minutes ago.
I'm in the works of getting my VA disability increased because of this and extra therapy sessions, but all I get is platitudes and "just go along with it, you need your job" kind of shit.
I am SOOOOOOOO fed up with it. SOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUCKING FED UP WITH IT.
If I were not a man of my word, I would not be here right now. I am a man of my word and I will be here until the bitter end.
You are being bombarded (attacked!!) with hopelessness and negativity from every angle of media. I feel it too sometimes. I have one good friend who will soapbox with me about all of this - pretty much my only real friend.
I knew a marine who took his own life, leaving behind a wife a four kids. I know a special forces guy who is both physically and emotionally damaged from his time. My husband was in the navy ten years and has some issues, but thankfully not too many.
The stigma associated with mental and emotional healthcare needs to be broken down. I am sorry for your struggles, and I pray for your heart, mind, and body to be strong.
What helps me when I feel low is to be of service, even if it's just cooking a meal for someone. There are some lonely folks in nursing homes who might have their own stories to share and just want to talk. Maybe you have a neighbor who can't get around to mowing the grass. Send someone a letter - yay! Something that's not a bill or junk! Pay for the person behind you at a drive-through.
That stuff does help. I donate quite a bit of my money to various animal rescues because it makes me feel better. Dogs and cats are better people than most people.
I'm so happy to see people who have similar views as me. I think the actual policies we're seeing (mask mandates, not allowed to socialize etc) are starting to take control over the good I try to do?
I can't tell you how many times prior friends have griefed me over something only to realize I donate more time/money to charity than they make. Not to mention I'm O NEG blood type, my blood is in high demand and I'm stupid enough to accept passing out on the table monthly to donate that shit.
That's awesome! I'm glad you have some good outlets and charities. Way to go on the blood donation too. Maybe if the lockdowns don't prevent it (not sure how libtarded your leadership is), you could walk some dogs at the local shelter. They would certainly like the attention. I agree that animals are better people in a lot of ways. I have a dog and a cat, and they can help me get out of my own head sometimes. I hope you get some encouragement. Reaching out is awesome, and this community of strangers is a big help.
My retirement plan is to be a shelter myself for animals. I want to take in the dog's that'll get put down otherwise.
I joke that'll I'll be wearing a loin cloth with a long beard, weilding a staff, and surrounding by ugly old dogs
I love it! I'm such a bleeding heart I could totally do that. One dog with a crooked jaw and missing eye. Another with three legs. One with brain damage that can't walk stright. Another super old and rickety. Another patchy and ratty. I would love on them all.