3964
POTUS makes statement regarding Twitter hack (media.patriots.win) 💩 SHITPOST 💩
posted ago by South_Florida_Guy +3964 / -0
Comments (71)
sorted by:
141
theClutchologist 141 points ago +143 / -2

But she caught me on the counter,

72
sustainable_saltmine 72 points ago +72 / -0

(It wasn't me) Saw me banging on the sofa (It wasn't me) I even had her in the shower

(It wasn't me) She even caught me on camera

(It wasn't me) She saw the marks on my shoulder (It wasn't me) Heard the words that I told her (It wasn't me)

31
anthemstander 31 points ago +32 / -1

Loved when the powers-that-be decided "banging" was too graphic on the radio so they changed it to "love on the bathroom floor." Really?

21
I_Am_Winston_Smith 21 points ago +21 / -0

Gotta sell those Kidz Bop CDs to Soccer Moms some how

11
justforthissubred 11 points ago +11 / -0

I loved when they wouldn't let Jim Morrison say "Light my fire" on TV so he said "Bite my wire". lolz

1
Nalgahyde 1 point ago +1 / -0

♬ They caught me hacking on Twatter (It wasn't me) ♬

26
deleted 26 points ago +26 / -0
12
theClutchologist 12 points ago +12 / -0

and then Tim Pool admitted he was voting for Trump (it wasn't me)

20
deleted 20 points ago +20 / -0
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deleted 17 points ago +17 / -0
10
theClutchologist 10 points ago +10 / -0

Name checks out

4
deleted 4 points ago +4 / -0
2
theClutchologist 2 points ago +2 / -0

Party foul

1
deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
16
ekos640 16 points ago +16 / -0

🎶SLAPPIN TARIFFS ON CHYNA🎶

12
Gunslinger1776 12 points ago +12 / -0

It wasn’t me.

57
jennyfrutex 57 points ago +57 / -0

CNN: a suspicious denial from President Trump, backed up by no evidence. Inside sources at the White House, who we will not name but are definitely reliable, suggest the president is, in fact, to blame.

25
bangbus 25 points ago +25 / -0

Sources familiar with The President’s thinking suggest he found this act of cyber terrorism, and I quote, hilarious. Is this the beginning of the end?

13
Tookens 13 points ago +13 / -0

BOMBSHELL report. The walls are CLOSING IN.

6
Proud_American 6 points ago +6 / -0

The beginning of the end.

11
Azith42 11 points ago +11 / -0

you forgot the obvious impeachment to follow based on this rock solid evidence.

8
TheMutualist 8 points ago +8 / -0

Whenever these media outlets cite an anonymous source with ties to the Trump administration I can't help but wonder if their source is a gardener who barely speaks English. But that's giving them too much credit. I think they don't exist.

I took journalism in HS and a semester in college. For our weekly projects we weren't allowed to publish anything without 3 sources and at least one source had to either stand by their name or provide physical evidence.

7
jennyfrutex 7 points ago +7 / -0

I read the big article on Rolling Stone analyzing the myriad mistakes that led to "A Rape on Campus" getting published. And it really primarily came down to a journalist not tracking down enough leads, not getting enough proof, and letting a story go to press anyway.

50
Shariablue_Sorosbots 50 points ago +51 / -1

Barron did it. He's an expert with the cyber.

11
STEVE_HUFFMANS_BULL 11 points ago +11 / -0

He had some help from the notorious hackers known only as “Four-Chan” and “Cue-Anon”

38
dontUseVinegerAsLube 38 points ago +38 / -0

Adam Schiff is launching Impeachment 2.0 as of right now. Watch.

19
MadMaxUSMC 19 points ago +19 / -0

Aren't we on 3 now? I lost track.

11
dontUseVinegerAsLube 11 points ago +11 / -0

Walls are closing in?

https://youtu.be/f1ab6uxg908

4
Gkfraz 4 points ago +4 / -0

Loved that video

4
XcaliburCaliber 4 points ago +4 / -0

Laugh my ass off every time I watch that video

4
Spectre001 4 points ago +4 / -0

Thank you so much for posting that. Laughed so hard.

31
Cardinalix 31 points ago +31 / -0

And they wonder why we call him the God Emperor.

26
TrumpsGlassOfWater 26 points ago +26 / -0

RUSSIANS!!!!!!!

12
Aquamine-Amarine 12 points ago +12 / -0

That's who they're going to blame it on and then claim it was election interference. They're so predictable.

15
6
rooftoptendie 6 points ago +6 / -0

KEK!

13
deleted 13 points ago +13 / -0
11
Three_honks 11 points ago +11 / -0

Joe will probably put out a media statement when he hears about this, trying to take credit: "Yes it was me! I doubled all your money, and I will double it again if you vote Joe for senate in December!"

1
deleted 1 point ago +1 / -0
10
doctorhillbilly 10 points ago +10 / -0

GEOTUS is hilarious

9
McFatty7 9 points ago +9 / -0

Future Juan Williams: "Trump initiated this hack as a distraction to jin up his base"

8
freeperjim 8 points ago +8 / -0

Note the date...March 18, 2017

Still...LOL funny!

9
Ricky_CIA 9 points ago +9 / -0

For future reference the "SHITPOST" flair means that a post is satire/joking rather than reality.

6
South_Florida_Guy [S] 6 points ago +6 / -0

Yeah I left it like that on purpose lol

6
Ennius 6 points ago +6 / -0

The Lord has graciously given us shitpost Heaven on Earth.

6
CS212 6 points ago +6 / -0

LOL

5
Covfefe_Injection 5 points ago +5 / -0

Some shitposts wither in isolation. Some get stickied so hard.

5
1776ThereIsaidIt 5 points ago +5 / -0

I'll fuckin' do it again!

4
JRsDaddy 4 points ago +4 / -0

Interestingly Trump's account is fine. Seems almost as if there is an NSA person at Twitter making sure he has the ability to tweet regardless of all the other "blue checks" that were compromised. (In reality the hackers only had to get one account, the admin monitoring "blue checks", further showing the Trump is special over there at Twatterland).

3
SomeGuyOnTheInternet 3 points ago +3 / -0

Always plead Shaggy, it never fails.

3
cbonez416 3 points ago +3 / -0

Hahahah amazing. The man is a troll genius

3
ChickNorris 3 points ago +3 / -0

But where is Barron. We all know he's the cyber expert.

3
asiatrails 3 points ago +3 / -0

Friggin hilarious 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

2
El-Duderino 2 points ago +2 / -0

Time traveler confirmed.

2
Dialectic 2 points ago +2 / -0

Wish this one was real lol

2
MythArcana 2 points ago +2 / -0

It was 4chan. 😇

2
quigonkenny 2 points ago +2 / -0

CNN: Trump openly confirms he is behind massive Twitter hack.

2
ZincOS 2 points ago +2 / -0

Yeah. I already knew that

2
deleted 2 points ago +2 / -0
2
philandy 2 points ago +2 / -0

Twattergate.

1
fj9041jg8nqheufhqiun 1 point ago +1 / -0

too late tRump ... P E A C H M I N T S

1
ByteKnight321 1 point ago +1 / -0

CNN: That comment is considered by many to be dark!

1
supermagafragilistic 1 point ago +1 / -0

This would be a great opportunity for Trump to leave the platform citing security concerns. Think about the risks involved if someone were able to make a tweet from Trump's account, the results could be absolutely devastating. If I were the CEO of a company or anybody in any sort of role of authority, I'd be deleting my account right now.

1
silent_majority_2020 1 point ago +1 / -0

18 Mar 2017

1
CancelBLM 1 point ago +1 / -0

Next time, instead of whiting out the area and using a raster editor to add text, just goto a previous tweet and right click, inspect then edit the text in your browser.

Et Voila,

https://imgur.com/a/neCZhxI

1
SirBuzzKillingtonVI 1 point ago +1 / -0

Not gonna lie - I had to check the flair. Was all ready to click through and add a like to this magnificent tweet.

1
Indianapede 1 point ago +1 / -0

CNN gonna posy it with the n’t obscured out.