A very long time ago, I met a European young man in college. We had a whirlwind romance that ended abruptly when my American values regarding the necessity of marriage did not mesh with his European attitudes toward sex.
At the time, he walked away from the relationship with the remark that he would return when he felt he'd experienced enough of what the world has to offer. Loosely translated, he meant sampling other women -- but not to worry -- I was given permisson to do as I pleased until his return.
I was properly horrified any young American girl who has grown up reading romance novels would be. This was unlike any plot of any book I'd ever read. My broken heart took years to heal. I finally met a young American man whose values were identical to mine, and we planned our wedding.
As a soon to be bride, I had deposits down on everything and my wedding gown (which I was sewing myself) already in progress --when the phone rang eight months prior to my wedding day.
I was in complete shock to discover the European young man on the other end back, as per what he considered our "agreement". He had sampled enough of what the world had to offer to the tune of 31 (rather like Bressler's ice cream flavors I thought, when he told me this) and now he felt ready to settle down and procreate. I was the lucky lady chosen for the job.
I told him I was getting married to someone else. I never told him that the thought of 31 previous partners revolted me and that if he were literally the last man on earth -- I would choose to die a virgin rather than be with him. And also, that his offer was insulting years ago and even more insulting when I realized he thought i had agreed to it.
So I know more about European men than I care to know, both from him, and others I've come across in my life. They are very immoral when it comes to sex. They are so different that any American girl who takes up with one will probably end up with a broken heart.
As I've often advised young girls -- the charming accents are not worth the trouble of having a man that can't be loyal to you. American men are far more likely to have fidelity in their heart.
It has nothing to do with Marxism. It has to do with a piggish attitude and a genuine belief that wives are for breeding and the rest of the women in the world are there for their personal fun and games.
Furthermore -- please don't tell me (of my experience) "it's just one person" -- I've lived long enough to help glue together the pieces of many girls who fell for the accents. Some don't get out of the relationship until it's too late and suffer though tremendous infidelity for the sake of their children.
I am older than you. The young European man I spoke of passed away a few months ago of disease related to age -- I shudder to imagine what the grand total of his collected "experience" was by the time he shuffled off this mortal coil.
Things like that change women in unpleasant ways. I remember years of being suspicious of all men until I realized it as the European students and a few of those who would have been considered liberal back then who had to be avoided.
I changed my habits and only dated conservative American men. But even then -- everything becomes confusing when you've had a relationship with someone who placed no value on the purity you were preserving for your future husband. I wondered if love was just a lie and relationships for men were only about sex after all. It wasn't supposed to be that way -- my books had promised me my very own "prince" and happily ever after. I was depressed and disappointed for a very long time.
I never (thank God) became angry and vindictive because of the experience -- just very suspicious of men's motives in relationships. Quite truthfully, my poor husband went through far more than he should have to gain my trust. But in all our years together, I have never doubted his love and loyalty. I got my "prince" after all -- he was just in another castle.
I sometimes wonder if these rabid feminists of today are just a different version of the depressed and disappointed girl I was all those years ago. Is their haterd of and vindictive attitude toward men a result of broken dreams and promises that were the result of some man in search of "experiences"?
I don't know. I'm just glad I'm not young in these times.
It's pretty awful, isnt it? Romance is pretty well dead --books and tv promote revolving door affairs. I don' t think they even look at one another as people with feelings. When someone is hurt they're just told told to "move on" as if it should be easy to detach your emotions from one person and transfer them to another at the drop of a hat.
If it makes you feel any better -- some women feel the same. My daughter (who is about the same age as you) often wonders why her friends can move from relationship to relationship without taking time out to assess what went wrong and work on whatever aspects of themselves contributed to the problem.
She doesn't understand how they can claim to be "in love" with a constant parade of men, one after another.
But I'll admit I sort of cheated when parenting her. When she was getting old enough to date I made her watch a film called "Looking for Mr. Goodbar".It's one of those things that can strongly discourage any woman from getting involved in a lifestyle of casual sex. Unfortunately, it's seldom run anymore. If it was -- you wouldn't see women acting the way they do now.
Once my daughter saw it -- she decided being "old -fashioned" was much safer.
I have to disagree here.
A very long time ago, I met a European young man in college. We had a whirlwind romance that ended abruptly when my American values regarding the necessity of marriage did not mesh with his European attitudes toward sex.
At the time, he walked away from the relationship with the remark that he would return when he felt he'd experienced enough of what the world has to offer. Loosely translated, he meant sampling other women -- but not to worry -- I was given permisson to do as I pleased until his return.
I was properly horrified any young American girl who has grown up reading romance novels would be. This was unlike any plot of any book I'd ever read. My broken heart took years to heal. I finally met a young American man whose values were identical to mine, and we planned our wedding.
As a soon to be bride, I had deposits down on everything and my wedding gown (which I was sewing myself) already in progress --when the phone rang eight months prior to my wedding day.
I was in complete shock to discover the European young man on the other end back, as per what he considered our "agreement". He had sampled enough of what the world had to offer to the tune of 31 (rather like Bressler's ice cream flavors I thought, when he told me this) and now he felt ready to settle down and procreate. I was the lucky lady chosen for the job.
I told him I was getting married to someone else. I never told him that the thought of 31 previous partners revolted me and that if he were literally the last man on earth -- I would choose to die a virgin rather than be with him. And also, that his offer was insulting years ago and even more insulting when I realized he thought i had agreed to it.
So I know more about European men than I care to know, both from him, and others I've come across in my life. They are very immoral when it comes to sex. They are so different that any American girl who takes up with one will probably end up with a broken heart.
As I've often advised young girls -- the charming accents are not worth the trouble of having a man that can't be loyal to you. American men are far more likely to have fidelity in their heart.
It has nothing to do with Marxism. It has to do with a piggish attitude and a genuine belief that wives are for breeding and the rest of the women in the world are there for their personal fun and games.
Furthermore -- please don't tell me (of my experience) "it's just one person" -- I've lived long enough to help glue together the pieces of many girls who fell for the accents. Some don't get out of the relationship until it's too late and suffer though tremendous infidelity for the sake of their children.
Marry AMERICAN.
I am older than you. The young European man I spoke of passed away a few months ago of disease related to age -- I shudder to imagine what the grand total of his collected "experience" was by the time he shuffled off this mortal coil.
Things like that change women in unpleasant ways. I remember years of being suspicious of all men until I realized it as the European students and a few of those who would have been considered liberal back then who had to be avoided.
I changed my habits and only dated conservative American men. But even then -- everything becomes confusing when you've had a relationship with someone who placed no value on the purity you were preserving for your future husband. I wondered if love was just a lie and relationships for men were only about sex after all. It wasn't supposed to be that way -- my books had promised me my very own "prince" and happily ever after. I was depressed and disappointed for a very long time.
I never (thank God) became angry and vindictive because of the experience -- just very suspicious of men's motives in relationships. Quite truthfully, my poor husband went through far more than he should have to gain my trust. But in all our years together, I have never doubted his love and loyalty. I got my "prince" after all -- he was just in another castle.
I sometimes wonder if these rabid feminists of today are just a different version of the depressed and disappointed girl I was all those years ago. Is their haterd of and vindictive attitude toward men a result of broken dreams and promises that were the result of some man in search of "experiences"?
I don't know. I'm just glad I'm not young in these times.
It's pretty awful, isnt it? Romance is pretty well dead --books and tv promote revolving door affairs. I don' t think they even look at one another as people with feelings. When someone is hurt they're just told told to "move on" as if it should be easy to detach your emotions from one person and transfer them to another at the drop of a hat.
If it makes you feel any better -- some women feel the same. My daughter (who is about the same age as you) often wonders why her friends can move from relationship to relationship without taking time out to assess what went wrong and work on whatever aspects of themselves contributed to the problem.
She doesn't understand how they can claim to be "in love" with a constant parade of men, one after another.
But I'll admit I sort of cheated when parenting her. When she was getting old enough to date I made her watch a film called "Looking for Mr. Goodbar".It's one of those things that can strongly discourage any woman from getting involved in a lifestyle of casual sex. Unfortunately, it's seldom run anymore. If it was -- you wouldn't see women acting the way they do now.
Once my daughter saw it -- she decided being "old -fashioned" was much safer.