Sex is totally a pleasurable thing, and both parties should get enjoyment out of that, but you conflate pleasure and casual sex, as if that jolt of dopamine were the only goal.
Casual sex is disposable. It actually removes the biggest component of pleasure from the act (the complete giving of oneself to the other, and the gift of the other person giving completely of him/herself to you.) Reducing sex to something that you just go get like it were a tub of ice cream cheapens the whole experience, and can lead towards some rather nasty things: self-abuse, adultery, and psychological burnout.
I would strongly suggest that you read "Theology of The Body" by John Paul II. In it, you will find a far more thorough explanation of the beauty of sex, and why it should remain within marriage.
One last bit, like it or lump it, women, unlike men, have an expiration date and a relatively limited window of opportunity in life. They also are more psychologically victimized by casual sex than men are, because men are hard-wired for casual polygamy, whereas women are hard-wired for monogamy.
(Women) are more psychologically victimized by casual sex than men are, because men are hard-wired for casual polygamy, whereas women are hard-wired for monogamy.
This. Women are wired to need their mate to STAY. That goes back to the caveman days. If he pumps and dumps, she could be left alone with a baby to raise - and that would have been a death sentence for both of them, with no caveman to hunt meat for them and protect them.
Some women can do casual sex for a while, but then the repeated rejections take their toll and she becomes unable to handle it when he leaves. Plenty of women have been labeled as "crazy" when the real problem is that the casual sex has started to feel real, real bad.
Even in casual sex you can completely give yourself to the other person. It's like living a brief fantasy where instead of being alone, for that moment you have a partner.
I don't know if you've ever had casual sex; and I'm talking about the good kind: a date or few dates and conversation to get to know each other. Or fuck buddies. In these cases you do feel an intimate and personal connection.
The only thing that lacks is the commitment to spend the rest of your life with her.
It's a bit like career choices: some people prefer to be a permanent employee, others prefer being an independent contractor.
Sex is totally a pleasurable thing, and both parties should get enjoyment out of that, but you conflate pleasure and casual sex, as if that jolt of dopamine were the only goal.
Casual sex is disposable. It actually removes the biggest component of pleasure from the act (the complete giving of oneself to the other, and the gift of the other person giving completely of him/herself to you.) Reducing sex to something that you just go get like it were a tub of ice cream cheapens the whole experience, and can lead towards some rather nasty things: self-abuse, adultery, and psychological burnout.
I would strongly suggest that you read "Theology of The Body" by John Paul II. In it, you will find a far more thorough explanation of the beauty of sex, and why it should remain within marriage.
One last bit, like it or lump it, women, unlike men, have an expiration date and a relatively limited window of opportunity in life. They also are more psychologically victimized by casual sex than men are, because men are hard-wired for casual polygamy, whereas women are hard-wired for monogamy.
This. Women are wired to need their mate to STAY. That goes back to the caveman days. If he pumps and dumps, she could be left alone with a baby to raise - and that would have been a death sentence for both of them, with no caveman to hunt meat for them and protect them.
Some women can do casual sex for a while, but then the repeated rejections take their toll and she becomes unable to handle it when he leaves. Plenty of women have been labeled as "crazy" when the real problem is that the casual sex has started to feel real, real bad.
I upvote your post, but I'm not convinced.
Even in casual sex you can completely give yourself to the other person. It's like living a brief fantasy where instead of being alone, for that moment you have a partner.
I don't know if you've ever had casual sex; and I'm talking about the good kind: a date or few dates and conversation to get to know each other. Or fuck buddies. In these cases you do feel an intimate and personal connection.
The only thing that lacks is the commitment to spend the rest of your life with her.
It's a bit like career choices: some people prefer to be a permanent employee, others prefer being an independent contractor.
Nice career choice honk honk
Learn delayed gratification instead of thinking with your coombrain.
That picture doesn't explain why sexual promiscuity is bad.