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81
BestTimeToBAlive 81 points ago +84 / -3

aderral will do the trick

72
SFgayDude4Trump 72 points ago +73 / -1

Yeup he's jacked up on something.

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deleted 268 points ago +272 / -4
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Guruchild 111 points ago +114 / -3

This professor, your wartime and other nuts became a lewd principal. You argued to me as an accurate cloud, just like her background exploiting. Your chess and mid-courses were a curved writing. You shoved to me as a neighborly medicine, just like her strikers jestering. My master is right. I can bathe my link with a tight carrot, I hope. I thought your spectacle was too magnificent to smile a time-honored page. He said you were the "tone!" Your proverbial aptitude was weaseling animals and prosecuted with an audacious garlic. Your thumb should be smashed by that live steel floor. An enemies. Well a galaxy of beauties your warped girl regularly delivered a deserted gliding. You challenge as they drop, the "society."

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deleted 54 points ago +55 / -1
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Kornstalx 26 points ago +26 / -0

This exchange feels exactly like a 23 year old Onion article.

https://www.theonion.com/alzheimers-sufferers-demand-cure-for-pancakes-1819564346

16
Tookens 16 points ago +17 / -1

I can bathe my link with a tight carrot, I hope.

lmao

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deleted 16 points ago +16 / -0
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Agent_Orange 16 points ago +16 / -0

Okay, let me try Joe-Speak:

"I got better looking girls that important? Because I said so! If you ain't same. Now let's get to work and finish what's what Barak and finish what's what's what's what Barak, I can definitely say I am without a doubt the accomplishments of my good brother, Barak and finish what. After all the planet. Why is than he ever has. That Corvette of mine is a really knew what's what Barak, I can definitely say I am without a doubt the accomplishments of my good brother, Barak and finish what. After all the s..., you know, the thing!"

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deleted 29 points ago +30 / -1
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PinochetIsMyHero 18 points ago +18 / -0

That was sheer genius.

18
HCQaddict 18 points ago +18 / -0

I know. Right? Biden has a very good chance at winning this debate on Tuesday. Whatever they gave him, he's got his second wind now!

14
WU_HAN_FRU 14 points ago +16 / -2

Listen, fat:

You don’t want me to come, I’ll be in town tomorrow or Friday, or tomorrow. You don’t know how much you can get it but it doesn’t matter what it would be like to get the people that they want, you gotta know how to handle your own problems.

14
sanstheskeleton 14 points ago +14 / -0

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand joe biden The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also joe's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Joe Biden truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Joe's existencial catchphrase "Come on mannnnn" which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as corn pop's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Biden 2020 tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.

2
horseface_aint_black 2 points ago +2 / -0

Please publish this as an oped in NYT

2
mrspaulrevere 2 points ago +2 / -0

I applaud your scholarship and feel reassured that Joe is the very stable genius we need for these times. I have been able to discern that "rubbing leg hairs" is a reference to D.H. Lawrence's passionate exposition of an affair with Eleanor Roosevelt.

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WitnessMe 32 points ago +33 / -1

He thinks he is still running against John MCCain

7
Please_Clap 7 points ago +8 / -1

No it was John CornPop.

2
Randomite 2 points ago +2 / -0

John Miller?

9
Smubbs 9 points ago +10 / -1

I almost feel like meth/adderall would make it way worse

4
LRRP 4 points ago +4 / -0

Yeah I think they are hitting a wall with the stims. Making everything go faster doesn’t fix the neural damage. They probably contribute to his agitation but they have to give them to him or he’ll nod off. People at thIs stage of Alzheimer’s tend to start sleeping a lot.