Trump victory happens. In unprecedented showing of reconciliation the entire United States government body (including the Democrats) in attendance at inauguration. Mormons launch their secret ultimate end game attack on their inauguration. Trump, the sole survivor whisks away to the frozen north. Now blinded, he works tirelessly in the waist deep snow to master his swordmanship using a katana forged from impeachment pens. Meanwhile, Mitt Romney ascends to the throne of the Holy Mormon Empire, first of his name.

Until one day, a shadowed figure approaches Trumps but in a blinding snowstorm. Trump is ready, his remaining senses honed to incredible levels. Just incredible. The best we've ever seen. "So my enemy, the apostate, the spawn of the traitor family has returned for his final lesson" Trump calls from our of the blinding snow.

"I've been down south Mexico way. Less eyes, less questions. There's nothing there for me now. Mormons raided and burned the guac bowl factory.. I got to figuring maybe it's time to end all this. Time for an accounting in DC".

Powerful arms come together in a grasping salute.

It's JEB!, and together, they'll make United States history.