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Comments (33)
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81
Passwarden 81 points ago +81 / -0

Well, the Babylon Bee is fucked now too... Because this isn't even satire.

14
deleted 14 points ago +14 / -0
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Trump4evergirl 7 points ago +7 / -0

You beat me to this👆🏻

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DisgustedByMisleadia 34 points ago +34 / -0

Dorsey ran downstairs and started smashing as many computers as he could, but he did need to ask for some help, as the hammer was pretty heavy. None of the programmers could lift the hammer, either.

Eventually, they managed to program a robot to pick up the sledgehammer and smash the servers. After hearing the Twitter employees talk about critical theory, the robot got woke and began attacking all the cis white males.

13
bellcurvestrikesback 13 points ago +13 / -0

Fuckin kek I gotta start reading more than the headlines on these

32
DylanSilveira1 32 points ago +32 / -0

Sure this isn't "Not The Bee" 🤔

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deleted 18 points ago +18 / -0
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Siteless_Vagrant 19 points ago +19 / -0

But that's not satire. That's actually happening right now. Can't tweet out and have nothing more recent than a 1 hour old tweet from Dice! BABYLON NOT SATIRE CONFIRMED!!!

17
bluto36 17 points ago +17 / -0

again the Bee correctly predicts the future

12
RealRightSideOfHist 12 points ago +12 / -0

This is a joke, but I could actually see them doing this since #CrookedJoeBiden is trending #1

6
NoMoreMao 6 points ago +6 / -0

The robot shit is pure gold! 😆

5
Gwoz8881 5 points ago +5 / -0

The bee is the most accurate and trusted news source in America

5
GilaMonsterous 5 points ago +5 / -0

Reality is giving parody sites like Babylon Bee a run for their money.

5
polish_snausage 5 points ago +5 / -0

I think they're installing malware

5
npeachmints 5 points ago +5 / -0

Babylon Bee conceives satire that gives birth to truth.

4
christosgnosis 4 points ago +4 / -0

Twitter has generated the greatest Streisand Effect I've ever witnessed - attention to the matter of Twitter desperately attempting to censor the bad Biden news (per his son Hunter) is saturating all of galactic and intergalactic media space

It's as though @Jack himself is standing on the corners or NYC hawking copies of the NYPost, saying, get your copy - read all about it - Biden presidential bid melting down in real time - watch it as it oozes into a puddle

3
DwellerMike 3 points ago +3 / -0

I think it is to reset some older code in liue of investigation

3
J-C-P 3 points ago +3 / -0

stopthespread!

3
TheWilderness 3 points ago +3 / -0

2 weeks to stop the spread. Lol

3
TruthWillFreeYou001 3 points ago +3 / -0

I thought Babylon Bee was supposed to be satire.

3
Hotswaps 3 points ago +3 / -0

Yeah but like, that’s what really happened though

3
AmericanGuy 3 points ago +3 / -0

Not the onion

3
Jaybird91 3 points ago +3 / -0

Based and bee pilled

3
Kilroy 3 points ago +3 / -0

They messed up, should be on notthebee!

3
deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
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deleted 3 points ago +3 / -0
3
mostlyatnight 3 points ago +3 / -0

Gotta flatten that curve

2
SheikFromMozambake 2 points ago +2 / -0

Not funny. I've experienced about 3 hours of unexplained internet down time today. Weather's been great. No power outages. This is whack.

2
White-tailed_Eagle 2 points ago +2 / -0

How is this satire? The Bee is becoming a very accurate news source nowadays.

2
nixienormus 2 points ago +2 / -0

It’s insane that this isn’t even a joke.

2
djembemc 2 points ago +2 / -0

They are scared shitless and desperate. Millions are waking up to what's going on as we speak.

2
MegoThor 2 points ago +2 / -0

GOOD!

2
salty_eight 2 points ago +2 / -0

Im confusion- why dont ppl, including Trump, GTFO twatter 7 months ago?? I ask this every time i see their tyranny. Take their power by switching service. Its so simple. Where Trumps goes, his supporters and all of his "replyguys" will follow.