I guarantee that My Pallet will be the most comfortable pallet you’ve ever owned

Yeah, but only one of those diseases has gunshot wounds, blunt force trauma, and probably something like acute radiation sickness as its symptoms.

“Health is sickness”

Yeah, 9/11 was the end of the 90s era that I grew up in and the beginning of the end. The iPhone’s availability on carriers other than AT&T in 2010-ish and the availability of Android around the same time was what launched the current techno-SJW-hellscape. It’s been insane since we put a box in everyone’s hand and said to them: “Your voice is important! Use this to put whatever whacky ideas you have in front of everyone, and we’ll force everyone to watch.” It was so much better when all that shit was confined to zines distributed at weird campus coffee shops.

She realizes that she has become... a fucking white male

Need those geezer dreams

true... I was thinking the South Park of 20 years ago

South Park was ahead of its time

You missed the part where pharmaceutical companies gain a customer for life

Iraq has entered the chat

I’m the President of the United States?

What can't you do after getting the shot? Have kids?

Live to the ripe old age of 50

Animatronic

Yep, some ideas:

“Pursuant to current CDC health and safety guidelines, customers are REQUIRED to wear clown shoes while shopping in the store .”

“All customers should maintain 6 ft. of physical distance and not exceed 1 mph while shopping. Speed enforced by radar.”

just a bunch of one-way and do not enter signs that trap idiots in a corner

A random metal detector and folding table at a park entrance with a sign that says “Park Entrance COVID** Screening”

** Concealed Objects made Visible by Inductive Device

For the left, it’s more like political seance, where the dearly departed can continue to cast ballots

Well, here comes the anticipated “carrot”. Soon, the “stick” will follow.

Notice that the reason is never about their own health

Shitlax is the preferred nomenclature, encompassing both shitlords and shitlasses

Just wait until their electric bill goes out of sight when we need to build more substations and generation facilities for electric cars.

MAKE AMERICA SLEEP GREAT AGAIN

Quiz at the end. If you fail, you are ineligible to cast a vote on the bill.

I want to believe

This is so offensive to Neanderthals, I am literally shaking.

We really need to also ban mandates by private businesses. Make it so people can wear a mask if they choose, but make it a crime to refuse service for anyone that doesn’t wear one

Yeah, we need an anti-mask mandate mandate now. Like, “you as a private entity have no say in what goes over people’s mouths”