It may sound lame, but I've been watching commercials from the 80s/90s and kind of reliving my childhood and adolescence through them. There is inherently something magical about watching a Hills Department advertisement, showing people actually shopping sans face diaper, smiling and seemingly enjoying the Reaganomics-fueled capitalism and consumerism during the holidays. It's honestly enough to make my lady parts tingle a bit.

Anyway, just thought I'd throw that out there. I've been watching a lot of ALF, too. These mechanisms make the incessant urge to vomit subside just for a bit.

Eh? Eh?

Hello. I am a libertarian, turned hardcore conservative, who swallowed a red, black and white pill simultaneously.

The situation is this world has me scared beyond belief and said events are starting to affect my children, and I get sick when I tell them everything will be okay. Because I don’t know if any of that is true.

We live in a very red state and am thankful that I don’t have to endure what I see happening in Michigan, New York and California. Still, there are plenty of mindless drones in my area, who harass my family for not wearing masks when we go out to buy groceries or enjoy a meal at a restaurant.

We are a Christian and patriotic family with members who have served in the military as far back as WWII. We still believe in the constitution, democracy and America. I know I’m new around here, and that you all seem to be in various states of tolerating our clown world; but do you have any advice or words of encouragement? Is there anything we can do to take back our country? As they say, I’m rapidly running out of both sticks and carrots.