21
coolhandcuke 21 points ago +23 / -2

Can we please stop using "Trans."? Just say a boy punched a girl. A man committed a crime and was allowed to be with women inmates. Etc.

Remove all the nonsense and cut to the chase.

2
coolhandcuke 2 points ago +2 / -0

Patient: "Doc, the voices keep telling me the CIA is after me."

Doc:"Oh my god. You are truly in danger. You must hire a bodyguard at once."

1
coolhandcuke 1 point ago +1 / -0

I read Amazon reviews for his latest novel. So many say they are libs and think the book is a mess because they don't want to be lectured to.

1
coolhandcuke 1 point ago +1 / -0

Peter Dinklage might get upset if they did. Can't have that.

2
coolhandcuke 2 points ago +2 / -0

Probably why Rose McGowan got a buzz cut in the nineties. Beats chopping off her tits, though.

4
coolhandcuke 4 points ago +4 / -0

The kid from "Kindergarten Cop" has entered the chat.

4
coolhandcuke 4 points ago +4 / -0

Yes, it's a myth that Napoleon was super short.

1
coolhandcuke 1 point ago +1 / -0

I'm surprised he doesn't get stopped, "Sir, I believe the gym is that way. You must have gotten mixed up."

2
coolhandcuke 2 points ago +2 / -0

Someone suggested this in the comments of an American Thinker piece today on this subject. People should wear buttons that say, "I'm with Fetterman."

3
coolhandcuke 3 points ago +3 / -0

How many were in the baggie?

They don't work like Tylenol. You need at least a few weeks before they start to be effective.

3
coolhandcuke 3 points ago +3 / -0

The employees at my local auto body shop dress nicer than Fetterman.

1
coolhandcuke 1 point ago +1 / -0

Starbucks used to have chairs for normal vs. plus size people, now all they have are the plus size ones. Wouldn't want to hurt anyone's feels.

2
coolhandcuke 2 points ago +2 / -0

"When she goes to the beach, no one else gets a tan." Weird Al

1
coolhandcuke 1 point ago +1 / -0

The way things were going during the pandemic and the way people who didn't take the vax were being demonized, I actually wondered if they were going to be rounded up and put in quarantine camps. Obviously, it's not the Holocaust, but the dynamics seemed kind of similar. No disrespect meant to those who actually survived the Holocaust.

1
coolhandcuke 1 point ago +1 / -0

So true. When I was a kid, and adults would tell me I read really well, it felt like being complimented on being able to walk or to breathe.

I heard that there was a speech they gave to freshmen at Harvard where they assured them, "You are not the one admissions mistake."

3
coolhandcuke 3 points ago +3 / -0

"Glee" once had an episode where a gay character was nominated prom "queen" as a cruel joke. How things have changed.

2
coolhandcuke 2 points ago +2 / -0

Someone got smacked with the ugly stick.

2
coolhandcuke 2 points ago +2 / -0

Men who rape kids aren't too popular in prison. I can see why they'd pretend to be female.

1
coolhandcuke 1 point ago +1 / -0

I once heard that Herbert Hoover claimed he was responsible for more jobs being created. He meant that more people were selling apples because they couldn't get anything better.

3
coolhandcuke 3 points ago +3 / -0

People post deeply unconvincing photos of themselves on Quora and inevitably get ego massaged with, "OMG, you're so cuuute!" It's sad.

1
coolhandcuke 1 point ago +1 / -0

Probably one day, liberal states will allow CPS to remove kids whose parents do not affirm their elfdom.

view more: Next ›