All true, in high concentration. If diluted enough it's easily consumed by certain bacteria.
I'm not suggesting you dump 5 quarts of oil in your backyard garden. You have to have a very low volume per acre to have the soil be farmable within one to two months.
Most of the ingredients you list are found in organic soil around the world.
We would pay a farmer to take our contaminated soil. He would till it into his fields and use it as fertilizer.
Oil is just decomposed plants from millions of years ago. When spread out it is fine. There is bacteria that feed on oil and break it down into useable nutrients.
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Replace the last few headlines with ones about the recent spat of anti-asian attacks and it'll spice things up a bit.